Against All Odds
by DeLambful Fiction
Summary: Once upon a time... There were two best friends. They loved to argue and tease each other. Secretly, they had feelings for one another, but she belonged to another, and both were stubborn to admit it. Then, she disappeared. Christian watched for her everyday she was gone. Then one day, she came back. ...Modern fairy tales do exist.
1. Chapter 1

**Against All Odds- Chapter 1**

Growing up I always loved fairy tales. Once upon a time two people would overcome evil witches, curses, dragons and many other odds all in the name of love then they would live happily ever after but can a fairy tale exist in today's world? Then I realized that while we do not have dragons and curses, we do have other obstacles that can separate two people who belong together and make them fight against all odds to end up in each other's arms. So begins our tale...

_Once upon a time there were two best friends._

One of them is me. My name is Ana. I am just your typical graduate student working hard to finally graduate and join the real adult working world. I have a few close friends but because I am a writer I am used to being alone for hours as I write and research. Maybe being alone is part of the problem; I have never been able to find love. Long dark brown hair, blue eyes and unlucky in love, that is me.

Maybe I was looking for too much? I read book after book and each love story make me melt but it never existed before me. No guy made me want to stare aimlessly into his eyes for hours or to burn with desire just to have them touch me for a moment. I had given up then the slightest touch made my knees tremble. That was the day I met him.

Jose walked into my life and from the beginning shook me up. He crashed into me at a crowded bar and his hands as he pulled me back up made me weak. My body was spinning as I stared at him. Our connection was instant but not in the way that I wanted, I was looking for love and instead I found lust. He warned me up front that he was not a relationship guy. I didn't listen to him and let my heart lead me straight into his arms.

What he tried to tell me that I refused to hear was that he was a Dominant and he didn't want a girlfriend but a Submissive. I spent hours researching what that meant only to find that a Dominant was a man who wanted complete control over women. He didn't want any romantic ties at all and what happened between us was not love but lust in its purest form. Our relationship was strictly under a contract, I was his Sub and he was my Dom. I let him tell me what to do and when to do it. I had no idea what I was getting into with that contract, I was his submissive...I was bound to him alone; I could be with no one else. He had complete control over me and not just while I was with him. The contract held me captive 24/7. I could be with no one else but left he was free to have as many subs as he wanted. Why would a girl ever do that to herself? In a word, lust...I wanted him in the worst way so I took him the only way I was offered. I am not a girl to sleep around so from the beginning of my time with Jose I willingly gave up all thoughts of any others. I ignored all other guys and devoted myself fully to our agreement. I told myself that I was just honoring the terms of the agreement but the truth is that some point I fell in love with him but he didn't do the same.

Jose never gave up others like I was required to do by our contract. He never hid the other girls from me. One day he even mentioned that he would love to see us all together. The thought make me sick and after that I knew I was trapped. I loved him too much. I put up with his life style changing who I was and my whole life around him. I dropped friends who didn't like my choices and became the perfect sub but it was not me. It made me into a shadow of myself.

Jose was such a different man that I had even known. He was hard to love as he was a true Dominant. He saw me only as his to have under his rules and he even told me from the beginning not to fall in love with him. He wanted me to obey, to submit and to serve but never to go any further than that. We did not spend much time together outside of his playroom where I served him. We were not a couple. I should have listened to my friends but once I fell head over heels it was too late. I had changed. I waited by the phone hoping he would want to see me and on the nights when he didn't call I would sit wondering if he loved those other girls. Were they better than me? Why wasn't I enough for him? I tried so hard to be what I thought that he wanted that it was my undoing. Jose noticed at once that I was acting strange. I could not hide the way it hurt me that I was not enough. My days were spent miserable trying to think of ways to please him and praying for his calls while my nights were either spent alone trying not to think of where he was and who he was with or trying my hardest to please him as his sub.

Then came Thanksgiving, I left Jose to spend the weekend with my family who were full of questions about the guy in my life. It was hard to sit there and talk about him pretending that we were a real couple. I had to make up reasons why he would not want to come and meet my family. That weekend opened my eyes as I watched my family. I wanted what they had; I wanted someone with me all the time not just when sex was involved. I wanted someone next to me in bed each night and each morning. I wanted love, love not this lust.

I went straight back home to my place to think. Sitting alone I knew I was just looking for a reason not to go anything, a reason to let things stay as they were but the truth was the I had no reasons to stay with him but a million to move on. The most important one was that being with him made me feel horrible about myself. Steeling my heart I went to his place to gather up the few things I had left there. Jose was not pleased to see me, as he talked about how he had not summoned me I brushed past him grabbing things from my room. His face fell as I did not speak. I just turned to him with key in hand and then I walked out on my pain. If only I had been strong enough to keep it that way, just hours later Jose appeared on my doorstep with flowers and the words of love that I had been begging to hear from him. He said he wanted to give up the others and be with just me.

Suddenly all I wanted was within my grasp so I lunged but you cannot change a person into what you want them to be even if they try. Jose did give up the others for me but he changed in other ways too. In trying to be what I wanted he seemed to disappear. I moved in with him but I never saw him anymore than I did before. He gave me all that he could but as we drifted apart I was left wondering why we bothered. That was that day I met him...my best friend, Christian.

Christian, just saying his name makes me smile. He was everything I never wanted...cocky and arrogant from the first moment we met and maybe that was part of his charm but he had me at the first glance. I have never been so taken with a man and so frustrated at the same time. I was not sure whether I wanted to hit him or kiss him each time we would talk or argue as we always did. He brought out a side of me that I had lost and I loved that.

At a bar with my best friend and old roommate Kate, I was just standing with a beer in my hand bored when across the room I spotted him. At first I thought he was an old high school boyfriend so I strolled over and introduced myself. As we talked I noticed up close that he didn't look like him at all but I was lost staring into his blue-grey eyes. He had a way about him that made me feel at ease at once and before long he had me laughing as I hadn't laughed in so long. Being with Christian made me forget how unhappy I was and I wanted to know more about him. I learned that he had a sister that he cared about deeply and made sure she was taken care of. The more I talked to him the more I wanted to know so I went home and looked him up. Using the internet I learned about his business and the fact that he was unattached at the moment.

For the next few days I researched Christian and tried to find ways to talk to my boyfriend but it was not to be. The harder I tried the farther away Jose and I seemed to drift. It was to the point that even when we were lying side by side we were still worlds apart. I was torn between thoughts of Christian and my obligation to Jose. Could I have chosen the wrong guy?


	2. Chapter 2

**Against All Odds- Chapter 2**

Sitting home alone began a normal thing for me after I had moved in with Jose. He was a photographer and used that as his excuse to never be there. Honestly I saw him more when I was just his sub then I did before. It never bothered me as much as it the weekend after I first met Christian. I was miserable with no calls or texts from Jose telling me where he was or when he would be home. Since I moved in we spend most of our time either in bed or the playroom, there was not the changes I had hoped for.

I just needed someone to be with, to talk to...I was not happy but I was not strong enough to do anything about it. I felt so trapped, how can you love someone so much that it hurts you? How can I give all of me and get so little back? Why wasn't I good enough? When he said I loved you...did he really mean it or were they just words to make me happy? I moved to the mirror and stared at myself. I looked like a ghost of myself, a miserable girl who had forgotten how to laugh and to smile. Being with Jose was hurting me more than I could tell anyone. Not even my best friend Kate knew the truth, she had been so happy when I moved out to live with Jose. She whispered to me that all my dreams were going to come true but that was not to be.

Instead each day my dreams began to fade, at first I had wanted to marry him and have children. That was my dream but then it began to fade as my hope and faith were put to the test. Now all I dreamt of was to have him home with me without me having to ask just one night. Seeing what it was doing to me I knew that I needed someone to talk to now, tonight and this moment. I thought of Kate but I knew that she would react badly and confront Jose. I was not ready for that but then my thoughts went to Christian. Would he understand? I could feel myself dying piece by piece each day as I withdrew into myself. I was becoming someone I didn't want to be...a girl who doubted her every move and was convinced that she would never be truly happy. With that thought in my head I swallowed my pride and dialed the number Christian gave me.

As it ran I almost hung up but then I heard his voice, "hello?"

Biting my lip and twirling a piece of my hair nervously as I tried to sound happy I spoke to him. "Hi Christian, it's Ana. Do you remember me?"

"Ana, let me think a minute." His voice was warm and friendly just as I had remembered. "Wait are you the hot chick that I met last night?"

Giggling softly I had to smile at that, "Considering I was home alone last night, I would have to say sorry that is not me."

"Really? Well that is too bad, Ana you said?"

"Yes you dork. I said Ana. A week ago, at the sports bar."

"Yes hot brunette with killer legs and memorizing blue eyes? The one who thought I was someone else. I might remember you; it is not every day that a beautiful lady confuses me."

Hearing the teasing in his voice I burst out laughing, "You are quite a tease. You might remember me? Sounds like you do, you remember my eye color?"

Listening to him talk about how my eyes were one the first things he noticed I relaxed and realized that it was the first time in that week that I laughed. It was hard to keep a happy tone in my voice but I was not ready to bring him into my damn dark world so I changed the subject. "I confused you? How so?"

"Yes you did, most ladies know who I am."

"Oh gez, arrogant much." I scoff back at him and then laughed again. "Must have been quite a blow to your ego that I was clueless. So sorry Mr. Grey."

"Don't be Ms. Steele. I enjoyed it."

"You enjoyed being accused of being someone else?"

"I did, you were very amusing, even while you were wrong." I opened my mouth to make a smart ass comment but none came to mind so I just laughed and called him a dork again. "Dork? I have never been called that before; you are quite a mouthy brat aren't you?"

"I am, mouth, bratty and proud of it, Mr. Grey."

"Suddenly we are so formal again Ms. Steele and Mr. Grey. I thought we were old friends." His teasing tone made me smile and wish that I was with him instead of sitting here alone. "Ana I like it much better when you call me Christian."

With a catch in my throat I said his name softly unable to sound happy anymore. Already talking with him had made me feel more than the rest of the week with Jose. I tried to take a breath and sound normal. "Fine Christian it is then and I am sorry for being so rude on our first meeting."

I heard his voice soften as he said my name, "Ana? Is something wrong? You sound different tonight?"

"I am fine." I stammered out surprised that he could pick up on that in just my voice.

"Fine is girl talk for anything but, I learned that from my sister. You don't have to lie to me. Where is that boyfriend of yours you mentioned that other night?"

"He is...um."

"Ana stop, you do not have to lie to me. Are you home?"

"Yes I am."

"Alone?"

Nodding my head I whisper back, "yeah, why?"

"I will be there in just a few." Before I could protest I heard the call disconnect and I was left sitting puzzled. I had not told Christian where we lived had I? Shaking my head, I got up and jumped in the shower. After getting dressed I was combing out my wet hair when I heard our doorbell go off. I spun around shocked, was that Christian? I peeked out the door to see Christian standing before me, "can I come in Ana?"

"I...uhm...yeah." I pushed open the door and stared at him. He was really here. I needed someone and suddenly here was Christian. Was fate trying to tell me something? Without a word Christian walked in and shut the door behind him relocking it before he looked over at me. I was standing there in shock as he came close. He took me into his arms gently rubbing my back that was it. That was all I needed to let go and the damn of tears I had been holding back started to fall.

"Shush Ana, come." Christian started to pull me with him toward the living room but I stumbled so he swept me up into his arms.

I turned my face to rest on his chest as he walked, then when he set me down I gazed up at him. "I am sorry, your shirt." I fumbled with my words but Christian just shook his head.

"Forget the shirt, I have others. Tell me what's wrong?" He pulled me back to him wrapping his arms around me once more. Within the safety and security of his arms I continued to cry until I was dry. As I sobbed he stroked my hair trying to comfort me. "You love him, don't you?"

Nodding was all I could do at that point as I struggled to wipe my eyes then I pushed back from him to peer up meeting his eyes. "Jose? I do, but he doesn't love me the way I love him. He never has."

"How can anyone not love you?" As Christian pushed a piece of my hair off my face I heard a tender note in his voice. His blue-grey eyes mirrored that softness making me blush. "You are a beautiful woman Ana."

"There is more to love than beauty." I sighed as I whispered back. My voice was hoarse and scratchy from crying as he motioned me closer again. I laid my head against his chest once more closing my eyes. "You cannot force someone to love you like you love them."

"What do you mean?" Christian rubbed his hands down my back making me relax against him.

"He never wanted all this, a relationship, me living with him but I pushed for it. I wanted more than he wanted to give me."

"Stop that right now." Christian shifted so my head was off his chest forcing me to look up at him. "Ana I know that I have not known you long but I see so much in you. You are one of those who are just as beautiful on the inside as you are on the out. You just haven't found the one who will appreciate all that...yet but you will."

Sighing as I gaze up at him I scowled. "You don't know me, you don't' know what I did...how I forced all this."

"I have all night, tell me."

"You really want to know?"

"Yes, did I come here in the middle of the evening for nothing? No I came here for my friend Ana; she sounded on the phone like she needed someone."

Staring at him I nodded, there was something about him that I trusted and I wanted him to stay right here with me all night so I opened up. I told him from the beginning. The night that Jose and I met...how I let that drunken one night stand turn into an unspoken agreement for sex at any time. Then how it changed into that damn contract and how that contract I signed gave Jose my body, heart and soul to control at his whims. I told him about the other girls and how hurt I was, all the nights I spend alone thinking of and wondering why I was not good enough. Finally I got to how I left Jose only to have him beg me back just hours later with promises and the three words I had waited months to hear. Never once did Christian's expression change, never once did I feel judged or scorned. He listened patiently only asking a few questions along the way. At the end I stared at him and sighed, "See I caused all this myself."

Christian's eyes seemed to change for a moment as he eyed me to a hard black then flickered back to his blue-grey. "First Ana you did nothing but fall in love, since when is that a crime?"

"But..."

He cut me off with one of his fingers over my mouth, "not done yet brat." I laughed and closed my mouth. "Second, I can tell just by the way you talk that you love him still. You left him once for all the right reasons but did you go back to him for any good reasons? Have you talked to anyone else about all this?" I shake my head and lower my face in shame. "Ana look at me; all you did was love someone so much that you went after what you wanted. A girl like that is one in a million, you are that girl. If he cannot see what he has maybe you should leave again?"

I bit my lip and look over at him, "are you done now?"

"Maybe..."

"I..."

"Maybe not." Christian cuts me off again and leans closer till we are nose to nose. "Third, I want to see that confident and sexy Ana that approached me the other night. Where is she?"

"She is not real, that is a mask I use to hide behind."

"I don't think so."

"What the fuck?" I stand up suddenly pushing him away. "Christian you dare to say you know me that well already?"

Smirking at me Christian rises and stands right in front of me. "Yes, I see that Ana. She is right there and dying to come out to see me."

"Why you cocky ass." I laugh and reach over to shove him away but he grabs my hands. With my hands in his something happens to me. I feel my heart beating faster and it's like a spark flew up my arms making me shiver but I ignore it as I pull away from him.

"Ana you are a brat."

"Christian you are a cocky ass."

With a playful glint in his eyes Christian comes at me fast and grabs my hands again, "No one has ever gotten away with insulting me."

"Well you are a smart boy, haven't' you heard there is a first time for everything?"

"No."

"No? Really?" I laugh and pull my hands free again.

"Yes I heard it but no I don't agree with it."

"You are a confusing man Mr. Grey."

"What did I say about that?"

"Sorry Christian...is that better?"

"No." He moved at me again so fast I could not move before he pinned me to the wall. He was so close I could feel his breath on my face.

"Christian let me go, unless you want slapped."

He laughed and waved my hands in the air as he held them in his. "I want to see you do that."

Snickering I rolled my eyes, "Fine you win this one. I am helpless in your grasp."

His eyes twinkled at me as he whispered, "I will never hurt you, that I promise you."

Before I could answer him there was a loud slamming outside and then the front door flew open. Jose was home, Christian and I immediately separated trying to act like that exchange meant nothing. Jose eyed Christian then spoke, "Who are you?" He looked my way frowning, "do you know what time it is?"

Glaring at Jose I shake my head at Christian. "This is my friend Christian. Christian this is Jose."

Jose stepped between Christian and me glaring right back at me before turning to size up Christian. "She forgot to mention that I am the boyfriend and it's late. She should already be in bed; I assume you know the way out."

"No! You will not talk to my friend like that."

"Ana, do we have a problem here?" Jose fixes me with his green eyes and then motions toward the bedroom. "Just go."

I peek over at Christian and see a vein on the side of his neck pulsating; I know it is taking all he has not to react right now. I lunge between them and hug Jose first whispering to him, "Let me show him out." Then before he can stop me I grab Christian by the hand and take him outside with me. Standing next to Christian's car I lower my head trying not to cry again. I can feel Jose's eyes on me from the house but when Christian pulls me into a hug I forget to care. As he held me in his arms Christian began to whisper in my ear, "Ana, you deserve so much better than him."

"You don't know me well enough to say that but thank you Christian. I appreciate it."

I start to pull away but his arms tighten around me so I cannot escape. I hear him take a breath in and I see his eyes closed. He is inhaling the smell of me. I cough loudly and he blushes. "You are not going to leave him?" His tone is hard and unreadable.

"Not tonight but I do not know about the future."

"The longer you wait the harder it will be, you know that right?"

With a sigh, I nod, "I know, each day I am in deeper."

"So I won't need to say I told you so?"

"No you won't and if you want to bail on me, I understand."

He pulls me tight against him at that and hisses in my ear, "You listen up, I am going nowhere. I will never turn my back on you. Anytime, anyplace...you need me I will be there. Never forget that Ana."


	3. Chapter 3

**Against All Odds- Chapter 3**

I wake up with Christian's words in my mind and Jose's body twisted over mine. It is something that before I would have loved before last night but now it just adds to more of the trapped way I feel. Sighing I turn my head to gaze at Jose as he sleeps. He looks different to me after last night.

Finally getting to share my world with someone else Christian's words keep ringing in my head. "How can anyone not love you?" "Ana I know that I have not known you long but I see so much in you. You are one of those who are just as beautiful on the inside as you are on the out. You just haven't found the one who will appreciate all that...yet but you will." "Ana look at me; all you did was love someone so much that you went after what you wanted. A girl like that is one in a million, you are that girl. If he cannot see what he has maybe you should leave again?" And his last words to me sting as I wonder if he is right, do I deserve better?

I haven't thought of what I would do if I left Jose again. I didn't think of it the first time. I just did it. Was I strong enough to do it again? As if he could hear my thoughts Jose pulled me close to him tightening his grip on me. I did love him but that love was beginning to fade each day that we were together. I thought we would grow closer not further apart after I moved in with him. Now more and more I wonder if I did not make a mistake.

"Where are you going?" I hear as I start to turn my body toward the edge of the bed.

"Getting up."

"Not just yet." His words which used to make my heart race today just made me groan. I knew what he wanted. He pushed me on my side then slapped my ass hard. "So you want to tell me more about your friend?"

Wincing from the slap I shrug my shoulders, "nothing to tell, just a friend who came over to talk."

"Ana." There was a warning in his voice that pissed me off. It was his Dom voice but I was not in the mood to play the little Submissive.

"Jose?" I pushed at him trying to crawl off the bed.

"No, you were up late last night...shall I punish you here or there?"

I shudder as he mentions there. That damn playroom, a room full of what he called toys but I call torture. Belts, whips, crops and canes to spank me with while there were chairs, benches and a cross with shackles to restrain me with. "No here please."

"Playroom it is then." With those words Jose picked me up and tossed me over his shoulder as he walked to the playroom. Putting me on my feet inside the door he just gave me his stern look and then pointed, "You know your place."

I sank to my knees with my head bowed looking calm and ready to willingly accept my punishment but inside I was screaming. I was being punished for having a friend? I wanted to tell him to fuck off but instead I just bit my lip hard.

He sauntered back to me barking orders, "Stand up, strip and get by the bench." I sighed and did as I was told only to have him instantly behind me pushing me over the bench. "You are getting 5 hits for that shit last night." I cried out the count each time he spanked me with his open palm then cried out again as he pulled me to the bed by the hair.

Falling back on the bed I stared up at him as he came at me kissing me hard and immediately pushing himself into me. His punishments used to excite me but now I just want him to leave me alone. I buck back at him hard until he pins me down thrusting harder and harder. Instead of feeling the rush that I usually felt today my body responded but my heart and mind stayed numb.

When I didn't moan like normal Jose stopped and grabbed both my hands pinning them over my head making me growl at him, "Let me go."

"No, you do not order me." With that he thrust one time so hard that I screamed out in pain before he pulled out of me flipping me over onto my stomach. Pulling my ass into the air Jose entered me again and continued his hard thrusts while I fought not to let him hear my crying.

"I want to hear you Ana. Now." He slapped my ass hard at that making me cry out again. I closed my eyes and clutched the sheets trying to forget him and picture someone else...finally my body and mind started to work together. I cried out as I finally exploded around him then I felt him release deep inside me. Collapsing to the bed I let my hair fall over my face as he lies next to me and I can feel his eyes on me. "So you want to talk now?"

"You will just hear the same thing, he is just a friend."

"Ana look at me." I flip my hair off to one side and then peek over at him. "I see the way he looks at you. That look tells me that he has some kind of feelings for you."

"He is my friend and he was worried about me. That is all you saw."

"Let me guess, poor Ana is all alone. I do have work you know."

I sit up and stare at him, "no you cannot use that excuse every time. You don't work every day and you didn't even come home the other night. No texts, no calls...I do worry you know."

With a sigh Jose shook his head, "I told you that I will not cheat on you, is that what you are worried about?"

"No its not."

"Then let it go, I am hungry." He hops up and leaves the room.

I stare after him but I do not move. I sit in the aftermath of being with him...I should be glowing and relaxed but instead I feel dirty and annoyed. He doesn't listen to me at all. I don't worry he cheats but I worry that he is only here because he feels as trapped as I do. How do I ask if he wants all this without hurting him? I sigh and roll on my back to stare up at the ceiling.

With my eyes closed I drift back to the last thoughts of last night. When Christian touched me a shock of electricity went through me but today when Jose touched me I felt nothing. I had to fight my own body to climax, what was happening to me? When I finally did manage to climax I had Christian's face in my mind.

Hearing my name being called I grabbed my clothes and dressed before I headed to the kitchen. I thought maybe he called me to say food was ready but no he was standing there waiting for me to cook for him. With a sigh I went into robot mode and made him something to eat before retreating to my bathroom locking the door behind me.

As I sank into the hot water letting myself relax and my mind wander...it went right back to Christian. I closed my eyes and thought of how he made me laugh, the smile he brought to my face without effort and the wonderful way I felt around him. I was relaxed, happy and confident in his presence.

Then I sat straight up in the tub as my cell went off, it was from Christian. I grabbed a towel for my hands before I read it and his words about the confident and sexy Ana that he met came to me. I open his message and lie back in the tub to read it."Ana, I just had to check to make sure that you are okay. I hated leaving you with him last night. If you need me I will be there in a heartbeat."

"Christian, I am fine. It has not been my best morning but I will survive."

"Did he hurt you?"

"Why do you jump straight to the conclusion?"

"Because the way he looked at us last night."

"I won't answer that question. Moving on...I am fine."

"Ana, I am coming over."

"NO! Christian NO!"

"Please no, I just can't."

"Okay I won't but then answer the question."

"That is not fair and you know it."

"You have two minutes before I walk out to my car."

"Okay damn it, you won't like it."

"That is not an answer Ana. You are down to 1 minute and 30 seconds."

"FUCK!"

"1 minute."

"Yes."

"Yes he hurt you again?"

"No worse than normal playroom stuff."

"I don't want you going in there with him anymore."

"WHOA! Christian do you realize what you just told me?"

"Yes."

"And why should I listen to you?"

"Because I worry about you."

"It is not your job to save me."

"No it's not, only you can do that but it's my job to make you see the reasons why you should before it's too late."

"Too late for what?"

"Ana, you know. Too late for you not to get hurt."

"It is already too late for that."

As my cell buzzes over and over I sit up straighter leaning over the tub trying to keep up. I love that Christian cares enough to check on me but it makes me wonder how long I have before he starts to push me to do something. It is obvious that he hates the mess I have myself stuck in. A loud bang on the door makes me jump and almost drop my cell. "Yes?" I call out.

"Are you planning to come out anytime soon?"

"Yes, was just relaxing."

"We need to talk."

I text Christian quickly that I will talk to him later and toss my cell under a pile of towels as I hear Jose rattle the door handle again. I step out of the tub to open the door then slip back into the water. "Mind if I join you?"

I shrug and lean back in the water. "If you want."

He strips and climbs in making the water slosh as I watch. "I am sorry I overreacted, you are allowed to have friends but you really didn't see it?"

"See what Jose?" I shift my legs to make room for him as we are now sitting facing each other.

"The look in his eyes. He has feelings for you."

I laugh and splash water at him, "whatever, you always think that. He is just a good friend who wanted to make sure I was okay. Nothing more."

Pulling on my leg Jose nods, I squirm trying not to slide as he pulls on it more. "I trust you Ana and I know you have been alone a lot. I don't mean to do that. I am not used to living with anyone or being with just one person. I do love you."

"I know and I love you." I grin at him.

We spend the next few hours together just the two of us. After the tub we watch a few movies together. I gaze over at him from time to time. I do love him so much and it is times like I live for, just us. The rest of the night passes as if a dream till bedtime. Jose went to bed first while I stopped in the bathroom to retrieve my cell. Just as I thought there was a message from Christian after my last text. "Ana text me back whenever you get this no matter what time it is. I just want to know that you are alright and if you are free tomorrow let's do lunch or something."

His message makes me smile and I text him back quickly, "Christian, you are definitely the best friend I have right now. You know all the things that I didn't want to share with anyone else. I am fine, it was a quiet day. Lunch sometime sounds great; we will figure out a time."

I spent hours that weekend lost in thought, Jose was near me but yet it didn't matter. It was not enough, to be here with me but yet miles away. Sitting at my laptop I wanted to scream but instead cranked up the music and found myself stalking Christian. I looked her up on Google and then on his face book page. All my thoughts keep turning to him even with Jose right in the same room.

"Ana?"

I jumped as Jose came up behind me and tried to quickly flip off Christian's face book page but it was too late Jose had seen it. "Yes?" I whispered afraid of what was to come. He turned my chair so I was staring at him and we were nose to nose then nothing as his green eyes stared into my blue ones.


	4. Chapter 4

**Against All Odds- Chapter 4**

Holding my breath I continued to stare into Jose's green eyes not wanting him to ask me why I was sitting on Christian's face book page. He continued to stare at me until suddenly he leaned over my shoulder pulling my laptop closer, "So no feelings huh Ana?"

"He is just my friend."

"Just a friend you are face book stalking?"

"I am not stalking."

"Did you add him as your friend?"

Before I can answer I see Jose scanning Christian's page then his jaw tightens and he turns away from me. Then I hear the door slam. Jose had just left without saying a word. I sighed then slammed my laptop shut.

With a quick text to Kate I headed out to the bar near her place. Once there I found myself doing shots and was soon so wasted that I knew I would be in trouble if anyone hit on me. With the room spinning I headed outside and found a place to sit leaning against the building in the shadows. Jose or Christian, Christian or Jose, both of them were in my mind and I could not figure out what to do about it.

Jose was my boyfriend and I loved him didn't I? The more I thought about him the more I wanted to cry because as much as I loved him I hated the way he treated me. I was feeling more and more like property he controlled instead of a girlfriend lately. When I moved in with him I thought things would change. I was no longer just his sub, I was his girlfriend too but I was treated just the same. It was like outside the playroom he didn't know how to be with me.

Then there was Christian, just being with him made me smile and every time we talked he made me laugh. It took everything in me not to reach out and touch him then tell him how I felt. He wanted me to break free from Jose but that did that mean he wanted me? Or did he just love me as a friend?

Shaking my head at the image of Chris in my mind I moan as my vision blurs then hold my head. I am at that point where I were I either need another drink or to pass out. With my cell in my hand I dial Jose but before he could answer I hung up. What would I say? Come and pick up your drunk girlfriend who you are already pissed off at? No way, my stomach lurked at that thought. He would pick me up and take me straight to his damned playroom over this.

There is only one person I can call at this moment so I dial Christian's number but it goes straight to voicemail. "Grey here, leave a message." I hear in my ear as I lean against the cold building.

"Christian." I whisper softly. "I need you, sorry but you said anytime." I stop not sure what else to say but quickly let him know I am at the sports bar we met at then hang up. Before I get up I think of Christian and fight tears, all I want is to be back in his arms where I feel safe.

Stumbling back into the bar I hunt for a while before I find Kate on the dance floor. She is with a couple of guys strutting her stuff. I grab her arm for balance as I yell above the music.

"Kate I have had too much, let's go."

She eyed me and pointed to the bar, "you are fine, have some water if you need. The night is young."

"But Kate, you said to let you know when I wanted to leave. Now, I want to leave now."

"Steele get another shot or something. Too early to leave, your man can just deal with it."

With a sigh I head back to the bar but instead of water I order another shot then down it. The night starts to take on a blurry quality but then I hear my name. Turning too fast I stumble and as I fall I think I see him. Strong arms catch me and hold me against a warm chest. I know that feeling, I know those arms and as I open up my eyes I stare up into Christian's blue-grey eyes but they are not full of the softness I saw last time. No they are bright and full of anger as I stare into them. "Christian?"

"I think you have had enough Ana, let me take you home."

"No, hell no." I pushed him away and tried to head toward Kate only to stumble again but this time I fell backwards. Catching me again, Christian didn't bother to let me walk but lifted me into his arms as I mumbled at him, "I want to dance."

"You cannot stand, you cannot dance. Time to call it a night."

"Christian, stop." I begged him and as he stopped walking I gazed into his eyes. Trying hard to focus in my drunken state his eyes were the one thing I saw. Blue-grey with flecks of gold and I whispered to him, "please do not take me home. I just can't..."

"Ana, I will not take you home." Hearing that was enough as I relaxed against his shoulder and passed out.

The next day I woke up feeling my head pounding and opened my eyes to see the sun peeking in at me but in a strange room. I sat up slowly moaning at my head throbbed then froze when I hear a voice say my name. I turned to see Christian sitting in a chair next to the bed watching me. "You might want these."

In his hand he has some pills and a glass of water. I take them and lean back, "thanks and where am I?"

"My place, do you remember anything from last night?"

I take the pills and swallow then start to shake my head at him but stop at once in pain. "I remember the bar and you said I could not dance."

"That is it?" I see a disappointed look on his face. "I thought maybe I talked some sense into you."

"What?" I stare at him confused and he tosses me my cell phone.

"You don't remember our talk and sending that?"

I stare at my cell and read a message that I sent to Jose at 3 am.

"Jose,

For some time now I have been so unhappy. I feel like we are worlds apart now. Either we need to work on this or I need to leave and for good this time.

Ana."

"What the fuck?" I stare at it and he eyes me. "I do not remember that."

"Ana all you did was finally tell him how you feel, are you sorry?"

"No that is all true but I am scared." I turn away from him to hide the tears in my eyes. "What if he decides I am not worth it?"

Pulling my chin back towards him Christian speaks softly, "I will tell you what I said last night, you are worth so much and if he is not willing to work on it then you need to move on. You are worth it Ana."

"But...but, I ...shit." I start crying and try to stand up.

Christian gently pushes me down, "relax Ana, he hasn't replied yet. He won't hurt you again."

"I told you, it is not up to you to save me."

"No it's not."

"Then why are you trying to?"

"Because I care."

"Why?"

"Ana." I heard an exasperated tone in his voice.

"Christian?"

"That was your warning."

"My warning?"

"Ana, do not play coy. You know what I mean."

I stare at Christian then gasp, now I know what he means. He wants me to acknowledge me as I do Jose, in sub mode. Oh fuck, then I remember his text to me about Jose and the playroom. "Christian, are you a Dom?"

He sighs then nods, "yes."

"And you know I am a sub for Jose?"

"Guys talk Ana and I might know a few more things about you."

Blinking my eyes in the bright room I stare at him fighting the headache I have to focus clearly on him. "Like what?"

"Not important."

"You are stalking me and it is not important."

"Sounds like you stalked me too."

"Oh my drunk mouth, what else did I tell you?"

"Just something about me making you feel safe." His face changes into a grin as I groan.

"Just stop, do not tell me anymore." I stand up and realize my jeans and shoes are off. I gaze at him and he points to the other chair. "Did you take off my jeans?"

"I did but nothing happened."

"Good." I brush past him to get dressed.

"You are not going to leave him then?"

"Stop please, I just can't."

"Can't or won't?"

Fumbling with my jeans I ignore him then turn to him with rage in my eyes. "You cannot force me to do what I am not ready to do, please let me have it."

"Yes I can."

"No Christian you can't, I am not yours to order."

"I am not ordering, I am begging."

"Begging for what?"

"For you to think of yourself for once."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Let me help you, you are not happy. You told me that last night again. Ana, please."

Standing in the doorway I eye him, "please stop, you cannot help me."

"Because you won't let me, stop being stubborn. You told me last night that you are lost. I can help." He grabbed my hands and moved closed. My heart started beating rapidly again as if time stood still.

Staring up into his eyes I see something there and it makes my heart race. I am breathing hard as he holds my hands and I can barely talk so I whisper, "I am lost, I don't know what I want or need anymore."

"I know Ana." He whispers back to me. "Let me help you."

"Why do you want to help me?"

"Because I care about you Ana and no sub should be treated this way."

"Wait, that is why. Mr. Dom here wants to protect the lowly sub. Thanks but no, I got this." I spew out pulling my hands away. In my head I am screaming at myself for thinking even for one moment that there was anything there.

"What the fuck Ana?"

Pulling me back to him Christian wraps me in his arms just like he did outside our place with Jose staring at us then whispers in my ear, "you being a sub has nothing to do with this. You need to escape, I want to help."

"I am scared; I don't think I can..." Just as I am about to admit I need his help my cell starts ringing loudly with the ringtone I gave Jose. As it plays I feel my body stiffen and I gasp knowing that he must have read that text.

Before I can speak Christian lets go of me, "Answer it, you need to deal with him. I will be waiting in the other room."

I nod numbly to him then stare at my cell before I accept the call and then bring the phone to my ear, "Hello Jose."


	5. Chapter 5

**Against All Odds- Chapter 5**

Standing outside Christian's place I hit accept on the call and brace myself for Jose's Dom voice to start to tear me apart but instead I hear his soft voice. "Ana?" For a moment I cannot speak then I hear him repeat my name again a bit louder, "Ana? Are you there?"

"Yes, I am here." I realize I am holding my breath and as I take in a deep breath I have visions of him pacing as he talks to me. His voice is giving nothing away; I cannot tell if he is upset or calm.

His voice is still quiet and calm, "Can you come home?" He clears his throat, "now."

His tone is not the Dom voice I was expecting to hear so I tell him the truth. "Not sure I am ready to."

Before he answers I hear a loud sigh. "We need to talk, I got your text."

With a sigh I nod, "yeah on my way. It might take a bit, I have to go and get my car."

"I will be waiting."

As I hang up the call I let go of the breath I was holding in and sigh myself. Is he really as calm as he seems or is this the calm before the storm? Part of me wants to run back to him and apologize for that text but another part of me is screaming at me not to be so fucking stupid. That voice is raging at me with thoughts of Fuck Ana how many times does he have to hurt you before you finally leave? Trying to silence that voice I turn around without looking and almost run right into Christian.

"Fuck you scared me, have you been behind me the whole time?"

"Ana you okay?"

"I...I don't know." I feel the tears start to pour out of me and without a word Christian pulls me to him. With my head on his chest I sob. I know why I do not just leave Jose, I do not want to have to admit to myself that I am just not worthy of love. No matter what they all leave me in the end...I always drive them away.

As if he can hear my thoughts I hear Christian's voice as he pushes my hair off my face while I sob on his chest." Ana talk to me; please I want to try to help you."

"I can't leave him."

"Why not? You are not happy."

"He loves me, and I don't want to be alone again."

"Again? Ana you have me confused, this has to go with more than just Jose doesn't it?"

Through my sob I nod, "No one loves me. At least not for long, they all leave me."

"Wait baby, slow down. Who left you?"

"I have been left before. Twice but it was all my fault, I am not worthy of love."

"You. Stop. That. Right. Now." I hear Christian's voice change as he pushes me back to stare down into my eyes. "Never ever talk about yourself that way again. Ana you cannot see what I see and you do not realize how special you are. You are so worthy of love but of a true love not this asshole that keeps hurting you. Why can't you see that?"

"Because." I try to explain through hiccups from sobbing. "He loves me."

"So what! Others love you too. Does that mean you should let them treat you like that?"

"Christian."

"No Ana stop, your past is your past. So you have been left before, haven't we all at some point? That does not mean that the rest of your life you are worthless."

"I..." My voice fails me as the tears start again then my cell goes off with a text. Glancing at it I see it is a picture of flowers. Not just any flowers but my favorite sitting in a vase next to our bed. "Fuck Christian I cannot do this right now."

"It that from him?"

"Yeah I need to deal with him first. Will you take me to my car?"

"You are sure you are okay?"

"I am, for now."

"Okay brat I will let you go for now but this talk is not over." He waves the keys at me and with that we head off to the bar from last night.

In his car we ride in silence until I cannot stand it anymore. I glance over at him and whisper. "Look I know you are only looking out for me. Thank you for caring."

Suddenly Christian swerves off the road to park as he turns to me I see his eyes are bright and he looks straight at me but grips the steering wheel so hard his knuckles are white. His voice is deep and intense, "I do more than just worry about you. Ana you told me lots of things not just the other night but last night and all those things make me worry about you. He treats you like property, is that what you want?"

"Property?"

"Like something he owns to use when he wants and to just ignore when he is bored of it."

"You think he is bored of me?"

Fuck, no stop. Wait." Christian took his hands off the steering wheel to run through his hair before he reaches over to grab both of my hands. "He treats you like he has you so he doesn't have to care to impress you anymore. He seems to not care how you are feeling from day to day. You told me yourself that you feel invisible."

Choking on tears I stared at him, "I do, I feel like I do not matter...maybe I do bore him."

"Stop that, you are not boring. Look at you Ana! LOOK!" He lets go of my hands to pull down the visor over my head to make the mirror pop in front of me. I stare at my reflection as he speaks. "You are beautiful, you are funny, and you are cute when you are being a brat. Ana you are not boring in any way."

I turn my head to look over at him, "Christian, thank you for all that. You are the only one I have ever shared all this with. I hate burdening you."

Leaning over toward me so quickly it scares me that he is coming to kiss me I can only stare. My heart races and I lean closer but he stops to kiss my cheek. Closing my eyes I let myself get lost in that touch. His lips graze my cheek and my body shakes. I want so much more but I know it's wrong so I just stare at him. "You are not burdening me but yourself. You should have shared sooner then it would be easier to save you."

"You cannot save me, I told you I have to do that myself but I..." I stop and bite my lip. "I like that you want to help me." My heart races and I know what I wanted to say but I can't, I just cannot bring him into this mess. "Please drive."

Without a word Christian turns back his attention to driving and as he does I lean back staring at him. Just the way he talks shows how he cares about me but is there more to it? I know there is on my side but it scares me. Suddenly I have to know. "Christian?"

"Yeah." He asked with his focus on the road.

I bite my lip hard and then whisper, "You don't have feelings for me do you?"

Watching his face closely, I swear that I see his jaw tighten for a moment but he quickly answers me, "as my best friend yes Ana. I want you safe; does that mean I have to be in love with you?"

I see him glance over at me and I shrug my shoulders, "no I guess not."

The rest of the ride is silent as we listen to the radio. I worry that I should not have asked him that question but I cannot take it back now. Stopping by my car Christian grabs my hand before I can get out of the car, "Ana I need to hear from you tonight. So I know you are okay, please let me know. Last night is the first time I haven't worried about you."

"Because you knew where I was."

"Because I could see you and know you were safe." He leaned forward stopping again as we were almost nose to nose. Before I could move he kissed my cheek again and moved back. "I will show up at your place at midnight if you do not text."

"I will text I promise." Moving to my car I try to not worry what I am going to come home too. If he wants me to leave would he have bothered to sound so sweet? If it is over I will walk out with my head high. I know that I have at least one friend I can run to. With that thought in mind, I drive home slowly.

At our house I sigh and head inside to find the lights out, the house is dark. "Jose?"


	6. Chapter 6

**Against All Odds- Chapter 6**

"Sorry I had to go and get my car."

"I heard." He turns to look at me and I see something pass through his green eyes that I cannot read then he speaks again, "so who was it?"

"Excuse me? I got drunk and ended up passed out at a friend's last night."

"A friend huh? Cut the shit Ana, you were seen. You were with him again." He growled at me then pulled me to him. He grabbed me by the hair and hissed at me, "Did you fuck him?"

"Let me go and fuck off." I screamed at him but instead he tightened his grip on my hair. "No he is my friend; I haven't fucked anyone but you."

"You talk to him about us, about me?"

"Yeah I do."

"I don't like him knowing our business, and then you sent that fucking text. You want to leave you know where the fucking door is." He let me go at that and stood up. "I said I love you, I have not done this...living with someone. Your call, I am going to bed."

Sitting alone in the playroom I sigh and lie back on the bed. Staring up at the ceiling my mind races, my call so what do I want? I want to be loved and to love someone that is it. I always thought that when I found love I would be happy yet I love Jose...he claims to love me and I am miserable. If I stay with him, will it always be like this? I do not want to live like this but I don't know what to do. I look at the clock and see it's still early. I need someone to talk to but I can't bring myself to call Christian, I know what he will say so I text Kate instead. "Hey you busy?" She texted back right away and I texted her that I was on my way over. On my way out the door I quickly text Christian, "I am fine...I will text you in the morning."

After a quick ride I am at Kate's place, she whips open the door smiling at me but one look at my face she stops. "Ana what is wrong?"

"Where shall I start?" I sigh and hug her, "come on this will take a while."

A few hours later Kate and I sit on the floor leaning against her couch with an empty bottle of wine between us. She sighs and shakes her head, "why didn't you ever say anything before now? Ana I am supposed to be your best friend."

"I...I didn't know how to admit that I failed."

"No, you did not fail."

"Kate yes I did and this is the third time. I cannot do this anymore."

"You need to stop leaving in the past. They left you so that was their choice."

"EXACTLY! They left me because I am too much work to love."

"They left you because they are guys."

"Great then I will always be left or have to go lesbian."

Kate burst out laughing, "Nice Ana at least you have your sense of humor still."

"Yup I have me, myself and it to keep me company."

"Seriously you need to stop blaming yourself. Sometimes relationships don't work out."

"I feel like if I loved him more we would be happy."

Kate waved the empty bottle at me, "that is bullshit and you know it, you love him more than enough. I wish I could say what you should do but I just don't know. I know that I want my happy bestie back. Ana you have not been yourself in a long time."

"I wish someone could tell me what to do, I have only told you and one other. He tells me to leave him."

"Who else did you tell?"

"Christian." I look away from her as I speak not sure how she will react knowing I told someone else this first.

"Ana!" She grabs my arm, "look at me."

"What?" I gaze over at her and she stares into my face.

"You told Christian before me?"

"Yeah I did, something about him opened me up. You know where I ended up last night; he took him back to his place."

"Well you did tell him not to take you home."

"I did? Fuck I cannot remember last night."

"You don't remember him carrying you out of the bar wasted?"

I nod, "No I don't remember that."

"You almost fell twice; he had you in his arms before I could get to you. Then he told me not to worry that he was taking care of you. As I held open the door for you two I heard you tell him not to take you home."

"Damn, I wish I could remember what else Christian and I talked about because I ended up sending Jose a text that basically said I was thinking of leaving him."

"Good, damn it you need to. Ana all the things you just told me are horrible. Why would you even think of staying?"

"Have you ever been afraid to be alone?"

Kate grabbed me then and pulled me into a tight hug, "you will never be alone, you have me...sounds like you have Christian. Your friends will always be there for you. You are not happy, so give me one reason you should stay with him."

"I love him."

"You sure about that? I do not get that from you right now, sounds like an excuse."

"I think I need more wine or to go home."

"SEE!" She shook her head at me, "it is. You need to see it Ana. See the truth and then do what is best for you."

With a sigh I hug her back and whisper, "I know and I am working on it. This is not easy for me. I just need time but I better go now, I do not want to stay away from home another night."

She kisses my cheek and tells me to go but remember she is always here. As I drive home I sigh leaning my head against the door. The winds whips through my hair and all I want is to keep driving, to go somewhere where I can really think but I know if I do not go home again tonight that it will just be an uglier mess. Back at the house I slip in quietly up to the bedroom. As I watch him sleep I think of what it used to be like. In our early days all I wanted was to spend a night, a full night in his bed not to be ushered out after sex like a cheap whore but now it feels like a prison to me. How did that happen? How did we get from here to there? I lie down stiffly beside him and drift into troubled dreams.

"Ana are you happy?" Christian is sitting next to me in the darkness as I fade in and out of consciousness. I cannot see him but I hear him, his voice sounds heavy as if it weighed down by emotion.

"Do I seem happy to you? Would I be drunk off my ass if I was?"

"No you wouldn't but then maybe you should do something about that?"

With a snort I roll over looking for him in the dark, "like what?"

"Like stand on your own two feet, walk away...find someone who loves you like you deserve."

"Like this?" I try to stand up but my drunken body betrays me and I fall back on the bed.

I hear Christian laugh at him, "not exactly like that."

As I lie on my back he moves closer and finally my eyes start to adjust to the darkness. I see him clearly and it makes me smile. "Why are you still single Christian, a great guy like you?"

Pushing the hair off my face he grins at him, "I am waiting for the right girl; she hasn't fallen into my arms yet."

"Who is she?"

"No one, just looking for one that is perfect. I know what I want."

"There is no such thing as perfect Christian; you have to just love them as they are."

"You stop that, there is such a thing as perfect love but neither of us has found it yet. Maybe we are not looking in the right places."

His voice is soft and warm, it soothes me as I lie staring up at him, "you are right, damn it...I need to fix my life." I roll over to grab my cell as the room spins. I text Jose quickly before I forget what I want to say then quickly hit send before I change my mind. As I move to look up at Christian the room spins again and I whisper to him, "There I made my move."

I wake up with a start just as I pass out in my dream. Staring over at Jose I stifle a sob, that night Christian was right and finally I made my move only to take it back in the sober light of day. Before I can climb out of bed Jose opens his eyes to stare at me, "I see you are still here." With a nod I look down, "good now let's forget this shit and have a good day. I love you babe." I nod again and sit there still as he gets up and heads to work. The rest of the day that dream and the memory of that night haunts me. Why am I so brave when drunk and so scared when sober?

The rest of the week passed as the one before, nothing had changed in Jose's behavior but my feelings were reaching their limit. I texted Kate and Christian off and on through the week but I did not want to see anyone, I was a spider trapped in its own web. The more I struggled to find a way out the more the web seemed to entangle me. I would either have to remain stuck as I was or finally break free. Friday night came and Jose announced that we were spending the night in, he had plans. With that in mind I texted both Kate and Christian I would probably not be in touch until Saturday. Kate had texted me furiously all week to leave while I could and that if I did not she was going to drag me out while Christian's texts were short and he seemed upset with my lack of decision. I was in a fog of emotions, unable to move forward. Too dark to see my way clear and too hazy to figure out what to do next.

That night I went through the motions, I cooked us a nice dinner and sat the table with candles and wine. Jose seemed pleased by my behavior; I was too numb all week to complain. Too lost in thoughts as I struggled with myself to make a decision so when he announced he had figured out how to make me happier I just stared at him in shock with the wine glass half way to my lips. "You did what?"

"I have an idea to fix our problem."

"And what is that?"

Jose grins at me and shakes his head, "Nope it is a surprise but after dinner I want you in the playroom."

Nodding I finish my wine and clean up before I wander down the hall to the playroom. The door is wide open and he has clothes laid out on the bed for me. I take them without being told to the playroom's bathroom, there I change into the black lace things and braid my hair. I am waiting beside the door on my hands and knees when I hear him enter the room. I see him grin when I peek up at him then that fades as his Dom face comes on. "Head down." I quickly look down and wait for his command. I hear the music start to play and he comes over to me. "Stand up Ana; I have a scene in my mind for tonight. I want to push you further than before but I think you will like the end results." I stand up and watch him without a word. "Good girl and I want you in the center of the room." I move to the middle of the room right under the speaker so the music fills my ears and he comes closer to take my hands and fasten me to the ropes handing from the ceiling. "Trust me and let go, do not fight me today. You may answer me."

"Yes Sir." I breathe in deep and try to push everything else out of my head as I give in to him.

He moves down to push my legs apart then I watch him fasten my legs down. He runs a hand up one of my legs as he speaks, "good girl, now I want you to just relax and enjoy tonight. Do you understand?"

"Yes I do, Sir." I answer at once as I stare at him. He grins then I see him pull a black blindfold out of his back pocket.

"One last thing, I want you to focus on you." He ties it on then the seduction begins. I get lost in his touch as he starts off just running his hands over me, up and down my chest rubbing my breasts through the lace until I am moaning then his hands move lower and lower. I am a wet, wanting mess when the music changes to a hard beat and I scream out as I feel a hard slap of a crop against my ass. The blows continue moving up and over my backside then I feel a soft touch of a flogger the front of my thigh. My body is already shaking from the constant blows back and forth. I moan louder then suddenly both hit me at the same time. Under the blindfold my eyes flutter open in shock, how in the hell is he doing this? Then I hear Jose speak, "I forgot to tell you the scene didn't I?"

I cry out as the hard and slow blows change. The hard crop dusts over my breasts and the flogger slaps my ass. I am so confused, and then I hear something that makes my blood run cold, the sound of another in the room. I pull against the restraints and cry out, "what is going on?"

"The scene is something dark I have wanted to do for some time." Jose's voice sounds cold and hard as the blows come harder and faster then the crop slaps my clit and I cry out at once. "Do not cum yet Ana, we plan to make you work for that."

"We?" I cry out wishing I could see but I am now sure I hear another person in this room with us. The sound of breathing is heavy behind me.

"Yes we." I hear another voice, it's low and deep and right behind me. I gasp as I hear a footstep moving closer to me then my head is yanked back by my braid as the crop slaps my clit again.

"Oh Ana, you want more attention is what I have been hearing." I hear Jose speaking as the hand on my braid tightens. "I have been hearing all week from your little friend that I ignore you. So I thought maybe you might need two to please you."

Tears sting my eyes as I try to explain, "That is not what I meant at all."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP." I hear the strange voice hiss in my ear as Jose laughs. "Your master did not give you permission to speak."

I cry out "RED!"

My scream is met by laughs, "oh Ana you cannot safe word tonight, I have this great scene planned, you told me about that fantasy of yours, the one about being overpowerered, well sweetheart...here it is."

My few clothes get ripped off as the blows come harder and faster while my mind races. This cannot be happening, Jose always said I was just his, he would not share. The contract even stated this. No way he was just trying to play with my mind. I call out red again this time all movement stops. I whisper to him, "Please I don't want anyone but you."

"Too late for that Ana, you bitched to your little friend about me. You want attention, you are getting it." He reaches over to crank up the music drowning out my words. I scream as they continue to touch me everywhere, it seems to never end. It varies between hard blows then soft touches that make my body want more while my mind is crying for it to end. I plea for them to stop but instead Jose only laughs. I want to slap him and run but I can't. Over and over the two of them bring me to the edge then stop before I can explode. I would fall but the ropes hold me up. I beg for it to end but instead Jose puts on my favorite song and I heard words I cannot believe, "She is all yours Jack. Make her scream."


	7. Chapter 7

**Against All Odds- Chapter 7**

The music blasts loud playing the same song over and over, a song that I love that normally excites me but right now I hate it. I cannot see or move. I scream out again wanting Jose to come and free me but he doesn't come. I feel tears running down my face as I try to lose myself in the song and ignore the rest of the world but I can't.

Jack's hands ran over me as I pulled at my restraints. Then I started to scream louder and louder with the song. "If you wanna scream...YEAH!" I scream over and over as my mind races.

I heard a laugh and then the music grew even louder as I hear Jack, "scream baby as loud as you want."

"Jack, not Jack Hyde?"

"I am flattered you know my name Ana. I will give you a reason to remember my name."

"No please Jack, just let me go. RED! RED! RED!"

The song starts over and suddenly all hands are off me. Then it starts again, as I scream out hoarsely. "NO! Just please STOP!"

Jose I would never forgive for this, this was his answer to help us to give another man permission to fuck me? And Jack, I would have to look at him every damn day after and know that I was given to him like a whore. I screamed and screamed again until I was hoarse but it didn't stop the attack on my body. Jack ran his hands over touching me everywhere while I fought the restraints that bound and rendered me helpless to stop him. Jose had disappeared from my hearing, was he still here? Was he going to watch this?

When I could no longer scream I felt myself drifting on the edge of consciousness and something inside me died. I stopped screaming as I let my body go limp. "Good girl, this might take all night." Jack's words made me gag as I prayed for it to be over quickly.

Eyes closed under the blindfold I let myself get lost in the music turning off my mind as my body was being ravaged by Jack. He teased and taunted me until my body started to respond to him but always stopping just as I was on the edge. My mind was off, my heart broken and my body was the only thing left showing response to him. I didn't bother to fight anymore, I would never win. If he wanted me I would not be able to stop him. I just closed my eyes tighter wishing myself anywhere else.

"What a good girl you are. Jose was right about you, I need more Ana." I groaned in pain as he grabbed me by the hair yanking my head back hard... "Ana relax, I won't take you if you don't want me too but I am here to keep you from being alone."

"You are what? YOU ARE NOT MY BOYFRIEND!" I shouted at him but he didn't let me go.

"I know and I do not want to be, I am going to keep you company."

"You mean fuck me; I am not a whore to be passed around."

"Maybe you should not have complained so much, you brought this on yourself."

"I never said I wanted anyone else, I wanted him."

Wanted?" Jack's tone was sharp. "Past tense?"

"YES WANTED! Why would I continue to want someone who just passed me to his friend without asking me? I am not his little whore...or yours. Let me go."

"No...I want something else from you too."

"LET ME GO!" I screamed as loud as I could hoping to make Jose come back.

Suddenly my arms fell down to my sides and I was free only to feel Jack grabbing me. Still blindfolded I swung at him blindly. Jack pushed me back against the cross in the corner of the room facing him then kissed me hard as he buckled my hands overhead. I bit at him but he only pulled away as he kicked my feet apart. I was once again helpless. "Please no, let me go! RED RED RED!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I am not going to be babying you like Jose did." With that he brought the crop down hard between my legs making me whimper in pain. "COUNT!"

I shook my head at him and screamed out for Jose again but before I could finish the crop came down over my clit again then again harder and harder. Once again my poor body started to respond. It was too much the pain, and the stinging...till I cried out at him. "RED you fucker! Let me go."

"You haven't figured out the new rules yet Ana, no safe words. You want off this cross you will COUNT AND BEG!" With that he slammed the crop down on my clit again as I let out a blood curdling scream of pain.

"FINE, I will count...FIVE!" He grunts at me and continued slapping me over and over till I hit a count of ten and whimpered to him, "please please no more."

He slapped me again, "Louder Ana."

"PLEASE STOP!" I screamed at him and shuddered as my body was being overwhelmed with heat from the blows. "Please..."

Then I heard movement behind me, Jose was here just watching. My eyes stung with tears, was I supposed to welcome this or fight it? How could he watch and listen to me calling for him over and over without saying a word? I heard him hiss at Jack, "Enough."

The music clicked off and I heard footsteps leaving the room but there is still someone here with me. The silence is deafening. "Jose?"

"Just shut up Ana, you do not want to talk to me right now."

"FUCK YOU! Let me loose now." I felt the blindfold come off and had to blink against the bright light. Jose was glaring at me, "I am done, let me go now."

"Fine." I fell forward as the restraints came off against him. For a moment he held my arms and we stared at each other. Confusion colored all my thoughts as his hands ran over my back. My stomach turned as I realized that if he loved me he would never have allowed this. To him I was merely a possession...I gagged in his arms pushing him away.

"NO! Do not touch me."

"Fine have it your way." He left me go and I fell forward to the floor.

"HOW COULD YOU?"

"YOU ARE MINE!"

"NOT TO SHARE!"

"Fine, I am sorry but I assumed you wanted more."

"You assumed what?"

"You want more, I was giving you more."

"That is not more. Too fucking late for words, you gave me to a friend like a piece of property for rent...fuck you."

"You are mine."

"Do you not get it? I am not your property."

"Yes you are. You signed the contract."

Turning to face him I glared at him, "FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKING CONTRACT! First of all that contract stated I was yours ALONE! Not to be shared with others and I remember that you and I broke the contract the day I moved in here. We ripped it up. NULL AND INVALID!"

"Then the sharing is invalid. You are my girlfriend."

"WAS! And look up the definition of girlfriend; you really have no clue what it means."

"Fine leave me then. You know you will just run to him."

I stopped talking to Jose and ran out to grab some clothes. As I threw things into a suitcase Jose came into the room with my laptop. He had it open and on my face book acct. I glared at him and reached to take it from him. "Wait did you look?"

"I am not in the mood for your games. Give me the fucking thing." I pulled at it hard just as he let it go. It flew up hitting me straight in the face. With tears in my eyes I tried not to stumble backwards.

"Damn Ana, are you ok?" Jose tried to grab my shoulders but I shrugged him off.

"I am FINE!"

"I didn't mean to hurt you."

Wiping tears from my eyes I glared at him, "oh you didn't mean to give me a black eye but you meant to share me with your friend. Thanks for clearing that up. I am out of here."

"Go run to him but you really should look at what is on your laptop first. You should keep your key for when you come crawling back after he sees the truth about you."

I grabbed my things and stomped out of the room. The laptop was the least of my worries as I jumped into my car. I did not have a clue where I was going. I started to drive only to have to pull over as tears ran down my face and I could not see. Grabbing my cell phone I called Christian. It rang and rang then finally went to his voicemail.

"Chris, I did it. I left him and now I do not know where to go. I am headed your way."

On the way over my mind is a mess of confusing thoughts. Will he hate me if I tell him what really happened?


	8. Chapter 8

**Against All Odds- Chapter 8**

Still in my car I jumped as my cell went off. I peeked and it was Kate texting me. "Ana, are you ok?"

"Yes, why?"

"Haven't you seen it?"

I frowned at her message and then just dialed her number, "Hey." I said as soon as she answered, "See what?"

"Your face book Ana."

"Um no, why?"

"Well for starters you are single now."

"Big damn deal, Jose sure changed that fast didn't he?"

"Ana did you ever tell him that you were in love with Christian?"

"WHAT? No way, and why do you assume that I am?"

"So you didn't post that on your wall?"

"POST WHAT?" I cry loud, "Hang on fuck, I am hanging up. Let me look."

Ending the call with Kate I pull up face book on my cell and wait impatiently for it to load. The first thing I see the post of our relationship being over but under it there is a post from my acct. I squint at the phone as it pops up. Fuck me it is a picture. Not a good one either, the light is hazy but as I make it out I scream out in frustration. That fucker is posting pictures he took of me in his playroom. I am blindfolded and lying tied up on the bed. I drop the phone as I try to figure out how to make the picture go away.

As I fumble with it, my cell goes off with Chris's music but I cannot answer it before it goes to voicemail. Swearing to myself I manage to down the picture only to have another one come up. "FUCK!" I realize at once that Jose must be logged into my account.

Then a message pops up, "You didn't like that picture Ana? I have lots more to show your new boyfriend; maybe I will tag him in the next one."

"NO Jose please, stop this right now."

"Then come back home."

"What? You are blackmailing me to come back? Why?"

"I love you."

"That is not love that is bullshit."

"Are you sure you are not pregnant Ana?"

"WHAT?"

"You missed your last shot. Oh did I forget to give you that message?"

"You said you never wanted to marry me or have kids so why would you do that?"

"Well for all your bitching, a baby would keep you busy."

"That is not a reason to have a child. When was the appointment?"

"I don't' know, a few weeks ago."

"I HATE YOU!"

"Hate me or not, if you are pregnant you will never be free of me."

I slam my cell down in frustration and feel sick to my stomach. What are the chances? I should be fine right? Right?

Just then I see a car pull into Christian's driveway and thank god under my breath that he is here but just as I open my car door I see a woman get out of the passenger seat of his car. I blink looking at her. Tall blond who comes straight over to him reaching out for his hands. Who the hell is that?

My cell starts to buzz again over and over drawing my attention away. I look at it to see that Jose is now flooding my wall with pictures. Each one is worse than the last and then I see he is now tagging Christian in them. I jump into settings trying to figure out a way to disable tagging when my cell locks up on me. Swearing again I start crying. Please god do not let Christian see those.

I lean back slamming my door shut as my cell reboots and my mind races. Why didn't I know about these pictures and how many did he take? DAMN HIM! How can I get them destroyed?

I look up watching as Chris and this woman go into his house and then my cell starts to buzz again. There is a text from Christian telling me to get over to his place but my attention is drawn by the 10 face book notifications. I jump into my account trying to delete the pictures. I finally get them down then change the passwords locking Jose out of my account but I notice one picture I missed.

When I click it I miss and it opens up Christian's wall instead. My eyes are drawn straight to the relationship status. It says in a relationship when it was single just a few days ago. I pull up the information screen as the picture loads I start to cry again. It is the blond girl.

He doesn't love me because he loves someone else. It hits me like a knife to my heart and I cannot breathe. I have to get out of here. I came here to tell him that he is the one. When I was trying to get out of my head in that playroom he was the image I clung to. All the things he said to me echoed in my head. Weren't those things said in love? What about what he said in the car and the way he looked at me?

In a blind rage I quickly just deacted my face book acct and logged completely out of it. As my cell started going off I turned it off. Then I started the car and just drove. For hours I drove on and on feeling lost and empty inside. I had no idea where to go and I did not dare turn my phone back on. Finally just about out of gas I pulled into a small hotel off the side of the interstate.

Once inside the room I did not bother to turn on the lights but sat in the darkness on the bed my mind still racing. Christian is all I can think about. I see him and the first time we met. His smile as we talked and the way he made me laugh so easily. The first time he hugged me that night as he told me that I deserved better and in the car the way he looked at me. Did all that mean nothing?

As the hours passed slowly I gave up and let the flood of tears come out of me as the room grew darker and darker. I could not fall asleep thinking of it all. I was worried that Christian might have seen those pictures and was Jose still posting them? How could he be so hateful to me after all our time together?

Flitting in and out of nightmares I wake up as the sunlight floods into the room but I cannot face the day. I sit in the corner of the room just lost and numb. I am so scared of what happened and so confused. I feel sick and now I wonder it is because of this stress or am I pregnant? That thought alone makes me gag. I cannot be tied to him forever.

With nothing but time on my hands I find myself thinking back over the mistakes I have made that lead up to meeting Jose and agreeing to be his sub. Two failed relationships lead me here.

First a high school sweetheart who wanted more than I wanted at 16. He pushed and begged and pleaded for us to go all the way. At the time I was out of mind with worry that if I didn't give him what he wanted he would leave me but at the same time I saw a few of my friends hit by pregnancy scares. That was enough for me to say no let's wait. He did for two years until our senior year and that night he had planned for months. I was so nervous but he seemed to know exactly what he was doing and it barely hurt until midway through when he groaned out another girl's name.

The second hurt just as much. He was in a lot of my classes as a sophomore and we dated for a couple years. We had a good relationship but when he proposed to me it was a shock. He told me that he loved me and could never see himself with anyone else but then mentioned how much we would save on rent living together. Kate was my roommate then and she forbid me to move out. He hated that and hated Kate so he never came to our place. At the beginning of senior year I went to find him in his off campus apartment only to find him making out with his roommate. End of that.

So when I met Jose I was frustrated and tired of trusting only to be hurt so I accepted a submissive/dominant relationship so that I did not have to try anymore. I never ever planned on falling for him. All the time I thought it was just sex between us and I could turn off my heart was a lie. My heart fell for him despite my head trying to stay unaffected. And now he was my third failed relationship.

Was I unlovable? I never seemed to be enough for the men in my life. They all either cheated on me or were unhappy or both. Fuck...the more these thoughts haunted me the more I just wanted my best friend, I missed him and I needed to talk to him.

Missing Christian more and more every moment the days began to fade into each other. For 5 days I did nothing but sit in the darkness thinking then on the 6th day I could stand it no more I had to see him. At least a picture of him so I grabbed my laptop and as it booted up I wondered was he missing me at all. The screen came up to my face book log in and I froze, I did not want to open that back up.

So I created a new acct using a different name and went straight to Christian's wall. Lucky for me he did not have it closed to non-friends and I was able to see some of his posts and pictures. The relationship status was still there but his posts were few and far between. His pictures are what I stared at as I wondered what to do next. Did I dare to friend him and try to talk to him or not? Closing my eyes before I lost my nerve I clicked the friend request button.

The rest of the next day passes must like the others but then suddenly my new face book went off, Christian had accepted my request. I jumped to his page and now as his friend suddenly I saw post after post that I could not before. He had been looking for me. I see he had friended Kate since I disappeared and they have posted back and forth. Then I see a post that breaks my heart and I know in my heart it is meant for me.

**Christian Trevelyan Grey**

**If only I could have kissed you just once.**

Like · · Share · Sunday · 

At those words I melt and immediately start looking for more. I spotted Jose in his friends list making me cringed. Then I eyed my cell phone and wondered if Christian had tried to reach me. Picking it up and holding it but I was not brave enough to turn it back on yet. So instead I plugged it in and let the thing charge overnight while I tossed in and out of nightmares.

In my dreams I saw Christian and I was with him finally about to tell him how I feel when suddenly Jose was there with those awful pictures. He drove Christian away and then was coming back after me taunting me about being pregnant. I woke up to vomit and hold my stomach in disgust. I knew then what I needed to do.

As the first light comes I got into my car and headed back towards the nearest town to get a pregnancy test I needed to put that worry to rest. Back at my room I took the test then hopped into the shower while I waited. I had a plan but it all depends on the results of that. With just a glance I let out a whoop of relief then dry off. One thing done and a few more to go.

I turned my cell back on and fired up my laptop at the same time. As my phone came life it went crazy buzzing non-stop as all the missed messages loaded. I had never seen it go off so much. Ignoring its noise I turned my attention to my face book and clicked on Chris's page. He was online. I started trying to figure out what to say to him after all this time.

Grabbing my finally quiet phone I paged through the messages. Jose texted me a few times. All threats about leaving him and about releasing all of the pictures. I ignored those and found some from Kate. Then I found what I wanted to see the ones from Christian. There were so many. They started about 20 minutes after I left him that voice mail and continue on and on. Each one wanted to know where I am and if I am safe. He texted every day I was gone and as I held the phone in my hands it went off again. My eyes widened as I see it was from him.

"Ana, I wish you would let me know you are alright. I miss you so much."

I cannot wait anymore I have to talk to him. I do not bother texting but dialed his number. He answered it right away, "Ana?"

"Yes." I whispered.

"Oh my god Ana! Are you alright?"

"I don't know, I think I am numb."

"Where the hell are you?"

"In a hotel in some little town. I drove till I ran out of gas."

I heard voices in the background then he came back to me, "do not move."

"Christian?"

"Just don't move."

I whispered to him "yes. I will not move." Then the line went dead. I sat there numb not moving and not sure what to do next. Lying down on my bed and I let my mind drift till I heard something outside. As fast as I could I sat up then raced to open my door; I saw that familiar car and step outside.

Christian stepped out of his car then I watched his eyes take in the sight of me. In a few strides he was next to me and for the first time since I left I felt safe as I wrapped my arms around him as the flood of tears began again. Without a word he picked me up and carried me inside.


	9. Chapter 9

**Against All Odds- Chapter 9**

As Christian set me down on the bed I let go of him wiping my eyes and staring at him. "Are you really here?"

His eyes were full of warmth as he looked over at me, "Yes Ana, touch me I am here. I would have been here sooner but you didn't leave me anyway to find you."

"Wait how did you find me?"

He laughed then reached over to pick up my cell phone that was lying on the bed where I had just been laying. "Your cell phone puts off a signal."

"You traced my cell?"

"Yes and I would have done it sooner but you turned it off. You just disappeared."

"I was on my way to your place Christian; in fact I was sitting outside in my car but..."

"Why didn't you come to me Ana? I was worried sick." His tone made me cringe but I had to tell him what I saw.

"I saw her, your girlfriend."

"She is not important right now."

"Not important? Is that why you never mentioned her?"

"Because she is not important, Ana I want to talk about you right now. What the fuck did that asshole do to you?" As he moved to sit next to me I looked down not wanting him to see like this. "Ana, look at me. Talk to me, what did he do that made you run?"

"I...I cannot tell you." My eyes were flooded with tears as I struggled to focus on him. Without a word I felt him pull me into his arms. My mind was racing. All I wanted is what I felt right now. I felt safe again and ...loved. As that thought hit me I bolted out of his lap. I loved him and I wanted to tell him but how? If I told him what Jose did to me then he would hate me and what about that girl?

"Ana stop. You can tell me anything."

"Fine, Jose pushed me too far. He..."

"Wait." Christian moved closer to me again and gently put her hand on my chin turning my face to the light. "Is that the remains of a black eye I see?"

"That was my fault."

"I doubt that very much. Ana please I have not seen or heard from you in almost a week. Either tell me what that asshole did to you or I will march over there to beat his ass right now."

"You want to beat them both?"

"WHAT?" With that Christian's jaw tightened and his eyes grew dark. "Tell. Me. What. Happened. Now."

"Fine but when you hate me I am sorry."

"First of all nothing you can say will change how I feel about you."

"YES it will."

"No. It. Will. Not." His words are loud and his eyes never left me even after I stood up and paced around the room.

"When I first got home and Jose wanted to talk about the text he was upset but I thought we worked it out. He said he loved me and then told me it was my choice. The week was quiet and I thought about all the things you told me about deciding what I wanted."

"Ana..."

"Christian, I am not done." I turned to him, "Please let me get this out."

He only nodded as I sighed, "I have had that thought in my head over and over. I hated the way things were with Jose but I was feeling trapped. There is so much you do not know about me...you might hate me if you did. I cannot seem to have a relationship that lasted."

I leaned against the dresser looking at myself in the mirror as the tears started to roll. "The night I left Jose...he said he had an answer to our problem. He told me to meet him in the playroom." I closed my eyes and whispered, "He had a scene in mind."

I heard Christian's voice dark and stern right behind me, as I opened my eyes I saw him in the mirror. His face was pale and then I felt his hands on my hips as I started to crumble. "No, I can't."

"You need to, free yourself from the nightmare."

"He tied me up and blindfolded me, it was then the music changed and I felt something. I could hear something."

"What did you hear?"

"Another person."

"WTF!" His hands left me as he raged. I cried out as he hit the wall with both fists leaving a dent there then he took a deep breath before returning to me. "Ana I know you were his sub but did you ever tell him that you would consent to such a thing?"

"No." I whispered, "That was one of my hard limits."

"Did he let this other person have you?"

I choked on tears as I looked at him in the mirror and nodded. "He told him to make me scream."

"Did you use your safe word?"

"I tried. I said it over and over again." My mind flipped me back to that place as I screamed out RED! Over and over and I feel my legs give way. "NO! See I gave in. He made me into a whore."

As I started to fall down Christian catches me pulling me into his arms and pressing me against the dresser for support. "No god no, Ana you said the safe word. They should have stopped immediately. Do not blame yourself."

"That is why I left, I was ashamed. I was hurt and I was afraid. No one will ever want me now."

"Ana, look at me." I gazed up towards the mirror but Christian turned me instead so we were face to face. "Anyone would be crazy not to want you."

He deserves so much better than me but I am paralyzed with him this near. I finally moved stepping away from him only to trap myself against the wall. My breath comes hard and fast as I whisper out his name, "Christian..."

"Ana why was I the only one you called?"

"How do you know that?" My voice comes out shaky and broken as he moves closer to me.

"Ana I know everything about you. I have been watching and hoping you would turn your phone back on."

"I missed you. I missed my best friend."

"He missed you too, more than you know."

"I have been sitting here thinking of you but I do not have a right too."

"Why is that?"

"You have a girlfriend."

"Ana there is only one woman I am in love with and she is not her." As he spoke he moved closer till we were nose to nose and I could feel the warmth of his breath on my lips.

"Do you have feelings for me?"

"I might have a feeling."

"I KNEW IT! All the things you said to me...wait who is the one you love?"

Without a word he silenced me with a kiss...our first kiss. As his lips brushed mine I felt a rush through my whole body and my legs went limp. He held me up pressing my back into the wall as our kiss deepened. Never has just a kiss rocked me to my core like this one. I could barely breathe as I kissed him back wrapping my arms around him wanting it to never end. He whispered my name softly between kisses then started to run his hands down my neck.

"Christian, you deserve better than me." I lowered my head in shame unable to look at him after sharing what happened.

I felt his grip on me tighter then he leaned to whisper in my ear as he ran his fingers over my neck again, "Ana let me help you."

"You want to help me even after hearing all that?"

After kissing me again softly he nodded, "yes I told you that nothing would change how I felt about you. I love you."

"I love you too. I have wanted to tell..."

I was quickly silenced with a kiss and then got lost in his kisses, his touch and the feeling of being safe again. Just as we started to move past kissing he suddenly stopspe. "No not like this. I want our first time to be special. Have you eaten?"

I shook my head at him running my fingers over his chest. "I have not but I am hungry now."

With a grin Christian laughed loudly, "I meant for food not me." He gently pushed my hands off him and kissed me once more. "I want you too Ana but we are taking this slow. We have all the time in the world."

"We do?"

"Yes we do, I want you to come back with me and let me help you through this mess."

For the first time in a week I found a reason to smile and beamed at him. "I would like that."

"Okay." With a bounce Chris got off the bed and then pointed to the bathroom. "You shower and I will get some food. Don't you disappear on me again."

"Yes sir." Laughing for the first time in what felt like forever I sat up and stared after him. He loves me. I headed to the shower humming to myself.

After a meal and quiet time talking with Christian I am exhausted. He decided that we would stay here for the night then go back in the morning. Curled up in his arms I drifted off with a smile.

"CHRISTIAN!" I shout his name over and over but I cannot see him. I hear him calling out my name but I turn this way and that way. Where is he? Running through a strange house I trip over a rug then I hear my name again. "CHRISTIAN!" I shout again as I get up.

Following the voice I tip toe up a stairway and see a light down the hallway. As I enter the room there is Jose and Jack. They are laughing, "Did you really think that he would fall for a whore like you?"

"I am not a whore." I scream at them and run away. "CHRISTIAN! CHRISTIAN! CHRISTIAN! Please let me explain. The pictures, I didn't know. CHRISTIAN!"

"ANA!" I heard my name as I felt hands shaking me.

I blink open my eyes in the darkness and see him, "CHRISTIAN!" I lunge at him wrapping my arms around him sobbing. "Please do not leave me."

"Fuck, what did you dream? Ana, baby I am here. Calm down."

"Just tell me that you won't leave me when you see them."

"See what?" His arms tightened around me and he leaned over to turn on the lamp next to the bed. "You kept saying pictures."

"He took pictures. He was trying to tag you in them on face book."

"Is that why your account disappeared?"

"Yes. He was sending them to my phone while it was off too."

"Did he threaten you?"

"Yes, on my face book and text messages." I sigh and lean my cheek against his chest.

Handing me my cell Christian pulled me to sit up with him. "Show me."

I opened up Jose's text with the pictures and his messages then handed it to Christian. He frowned and then looked at me. "You know you can have him arrested for harassment? You have all the proof right here."

"If I do that everyone will know."

"You think he would blast it everywhere?"

"He probably already has, he was posting those pictures on face book trying to get me to come back."

"I read that. Have you checked to see if the pictures are still up?"

"No I am afraid to."

"I understand that but one way or another we will need to get those pictures and destroy them."

"We?"

"Yes we, I said I wanted to help you."

"Oh I thought you meant." My voice trailed off as I looked down.

"Ana when I said I loved you I meant it, I want to be with you and no one else."

"What about Elena?"

"I knew you were going to ask about her."

"Well she is your girlfriend."

"No she was a distraction."

"From what exactly?"

"Ana I am like Jose, Elena was my sub."

"Oh." I gasp then start to move away from him.

"Please no, I do not want that for you, for us." His voice grew loud in the dark room. "I have never wanted to just be with someone like I do you."

"So if she is just your sub why are you in a relationship with her?"

"She is pregnant." I heard him sigh then whisper to me, "Now it is my turn to ask you to please not leave me."

"She is pregnant?" I shuddered then at that thought and snuggled against him. "Well you have only had sub relationships and I have only had unsuccessful relationships. Are you sure you are up to this?"

"You make it sound like a challenge?"

"I am rude, difficult, mean and a total brat. Can you love a brat?"

"I can love a brat."

"Good because a brat loves you."

"I just might love the brat too."

"Aww." I cuddled closer to him.

"Shush don't tell the brat."

Laughing softly I whispered to him, "dork."

"Brat, now go to sleep and no more nightmares."

"Yes dork."

Hours later I woke up feeling safe and still wrapped in Christian's arms. I did not want to move but instead I turned my head to gaze at him. Just the sight of him made me smile. As if he sensed me watching him his arms squeezed me tighter and he muttered in his sleep. Then I felt him grind against me and I moaned softly.

With a smirk on his face I heard his voice still scratchy from sleep, "Good morning Ana. Not happening here remember?"

"Yeah so you said."

"Now up and let's get out of here." Christian kissed me then headed to the bathroom while I gathered up my clothes.

I was deep in packing mode when I noticed Christian just standing in the bathroom door with his face pale. I swallowed hard as he looked up at me. "Ana?" I turn to him and smile but stop when I see him with that white stick in his hands. "What's this?"


	10. Chapter 10

**Against All Odds- Chapter 10**

Laughing softly I walked over to Christian and took the white pregnancy test out of his hand. "This is my freedom. I had to be sure that I was not going to be trapped by a baby with that asshole."

"A white sticks tells you all that?"

"You smart ass, it told me I was not pregnant."

"So it is negative?"

"Yes it is."

"But I thought this was a positive result."

"No there is no blue cross." I disappeared into the bathroom to grab the instructions and show him.

"I see, well good. Now let's celebrate by going home. Packed?"

"Yes I am."

"Good now are you ready to get out of here?"

"Yes Christian let's go."

Outside we put my things in his car. I glance over where my car was but it's gone." Hey where the fuck is my car?"

"On its way to my place, I wanted you to ride with me."

"You took my keys?"

"Yes." He grinned at me then moved to open the passenger car door and motioned to me, "Get in and let's get going."

In his car I leaned back singing to the radio as the miles flew by and all I did was stare at Christian unable to believe that I was with him now. He loved me as I loved him and wanted to help me start over.

One of my favorite songs came on and as I sang along he glanced over at me, "have you listened to the words to this song? This is you and me." As he turned it up, I stopped singing and just listened to the words.

"Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find that what you're looking for has been here the whole time. If you could see that I'm the one who understands you. Been here along so why can't you see you belong with me." The rest of the song I stared at him and grinned, he was right this song is so us. I started singing again louder this time as I reached over to squeeze his hand. "Standing by and waiting at your back door all this time how could not know baby...you belong with you."

"Sing it baby." I heard him singing along and after the song ended he looked over at him. "Took you long enough to see it."

"Not as long as you think. I have been thinking about you since the night we met but I was just not ready to admit it. I am a brat remember."

"A breathe taking one too."

"Breathe taking? I have never been called that before."

"Well you have now, you are my beautiful yet stubborn breathe taking brat."

"You do have quite the way with your words."

He clicked at the radio and looked at me, "I assume you would like more of her songs?"

"You mean Taylor, oh yes... today was a fairytale would fit this moment."

"Now you listen to this song, it fits us too." I grinned at him as I sang along.

"Today was a fairytale, you were the prince. I used to be a damsel in distress, you took me by the hand and you picked me up at six. Today was a fairytale." Watching him with a big grin I laughed then stressed, "Time slows down whenever you're around."

"Wait I am a prince now?"

"MY Prince."

"Time slows down whenever you're around. But can you feel this magic in the air? It must have been the way you kissed me. Fell in love when I saw you standing there. It must have been the way. Today was a fairytale. It must have been the way. Today was a fairytale."

"I think I am falling more in love with you, sing more."

"Oh stop that, making me blush."

"So you like all that once upon time fairy tale stuff?"

"Duh I'm a girl."

"So fairytales flowers and hearts?"

"YES!"

"I don't have any flowers and hearts handy at the moment."

I pouted at him and laughed. Then he made a face at me. "Really you got nothing?"

"I might have something."

"Like what?"

As he drove Christian flashed me a grin, "Once upon a time...There were two best friends. They loved to argue and tease each other. Secretly, they had feelings for one another, but she belonged to another, and both were stubborn to admit it. Then, she disappeared. Christian watched for her everyday she was gone. Then one day, she came back. They got to talking, admitting their feelings for one another. Now, she was his brat, and he her dork. Always." He looked over at me. ''Pfft, I'm bad at story telling. I gave it a try.'' He winked, blowing me a kiss.

"OH MY GOD!" I just stared at him, "Did you just make me my own fairytale?"

"Yes I did, you like?"

"NO I LOVE IT! No one has ever done anything like that for me." I scrambled to get out my cell phone and started typing up what he said in a note to myself to save.

"What are you doing?"

"Saving it. I want to remember it always."

"Only you."

"Only me would want to remember the sweetest thing that my new boyfriend has done for me? Nah I think others would want to remember that too."

"It wasn't that good."

"Shush now, it was perfect and I loved it."

"Do you love me?"

"Yes I love my Prince."

He laughed and the rest of the drive we laughed and sang together. By the time we got to his place we were both relaxed and just being silly with each other. My car was already parked in front of his house as we got out we walked hand in hand to his door then both of our phones went off.

"Elena? What do you want?" I heard him say as he unlocked the door pushing it open and motioned for me to enter first. "No we are not discussing names until I know that baby is mine and we both know we cannot know that until after it arrives." "NO HELL NO! There will be no talk of any money at this time."

I glance at my cell and see its Kate. "Hi there." I whispered not wanting to interrupt Christian's call so I head back outside. I heard him talking louder and louder as I slipped back outside.

"ANA! Where are you and why haven't you returned any of my calls?"

"Long story or short?"

"Long, I know something happened. I had both Jose and Christian calling me."

"Jose called looking for me? What did he say?"

"Only that you two had a fight and he knew that he hurt you."

"That lying ass, he doesn't give a shit about me. You saw what he posted on face book."

"He seemed to really be worried."

"Kate I cannot believe you believe him, you know how unhappy I was."

"Wow you are emotional already."

"Kate? Why did you say that?"

"Jose did mention that you might be this way. Ana you will be a great mother."

"OH MY GOD! He told you I was pregnant?"

"Yeah and it is on his wall."

"Kate I will call you back."

I tear inside and dig until I find my laptop then as it loads I tap my fingers impatiently. I could still hear Christian, he sounds pissed off. I heard him mention babies and then a door slammed. I wished I could help him with that mess but unfortunately I had one of my own.

Finally my computer was up and I took a deep breath then opened up my old face book acct. It came up with a post from Jose in the main feed. I screamed as I saw it, an announcement of us having a baby. I gagged them quickly started typing. "To anyone who sees it, I am not pregnant and we are not together ANYMORE." I hit send then quickly fire a message at Jose. "HOW DARE YOU! I am not pregnant and I am not coming back. GROW UP AND MOVE ON!" I hit send then slammed my laptop shut just as Christian walks back into room.

"Ana?" His voice was soft and I could tell her was still upset so I said nothing but went over to him putting my arms around him. "Baby what happened?"

"No, let's just have us again tonight and no talk of them. The mess will still be there tomorrow."

"Sounds good, what should we do?"

"I think watch a movie and snuggle."

"I love that idea. Let's eat first then we can do that."

In his kitchen we both turned off our phones then as we cooked we talked about our favorite things. I learned that his favorite color was blue and that he loved many of the same books that I loved. We had so many things in common that we ended up cuddled together on his couch just talking for hours and the movie was forgotten.

Then he turned to me kissing me again and the same rush that I felt during our first kiss swept through me again. My whole body tingled and I wanted more so I leaned against him pushing him back on the couch. The kisses that had started out as soft brushes of our lips together changed into hard needy kisses that deepened as we melted into each other. Before long he pushed me back then moved so I was on my back looking up at him.

"Ana, I love you."

"Christian, I love you too." I leaned up kissing him then he stopped pushing me back gently.

"Ana no, not yet. Let's just take this very slow."

"You don't want me?"

"I did not say that, I want you." He ground himself against me then making me moan softly. "Feel that, that is how much I want you but I want to wait. Is that alright with you?"

Staring up at him my eyes filled with tears as I realized exactly how much Christian loved me. He loved me and respected me in ways I had never seen. I nodded to him and whispered, "we have nothing but time."

In his arms that night again I fell straight to sleep but the nightmares came again. Running down a dark hallway I cannot see anything and I keep falling down but I have to get up and run as fast as I can. I hear them calling out my name. Screaming for someone, anyone to save me I hear Christian calling me to me.

"Ana! Ana wake up."

I blinked open my eyes and clutch at him. "Why won't they leave me be?"

"Relax you are safe now. I will make them leave you alone."

"I am trying."

"I know you are but you might need to talk to someone about all this."

Snuggled against him I frowned, "I do talk to someone, I talk to you."

"Shush now Ana, go to sleep."

In his arms and listening to his words I finally felt back to sleep only to wake up alone. I crawl out of bed and start looking for him. "Christian?"

Soft noises and a bright light at the end of the hallway caught my attention as I wandered. As I stepped into the doorway I see Christian standing by the window looking out. "I do not care who you have to cancel I want you to work in Ana tomorrow do you understand?"

He is talking softly but firmly as I move closer to him but then my attention falls to his laptop open on his desk. I see all the pictures Jose sent me on screen making me gasp. Christian turns to me, "I will call you in the morning but work it out."

"What is this?"

"Ana I was going to show you this in the morning."

"Why do you have these?"

"Jose. He sent them to me."

"Oh." I shake my head and rub at my sleepy eyes. "Why didn't you just delete them?"

"Because I have a better idea."

"You do?"

Christian came over to sit in his chair pulling me on his lap. "Look at this." He clicked another link on his screen and I see Jose but wait who is he with?

"What the fuck?" I learn closer and see he is embracing a blond woman. She looks so familiar to me then it hits me...its Elena.


	11. Chapter 11

**Against All Odds- Chapter 11**

Sitting on his lap I shook my head shocked. I didn't even know that Elena and Jose knew each other but then I gasped. "Christian, I think Elena has been funding some of Jose's work."

"And chance you have any proof of that? Let me show you what I have so far."

He clicked screens to show me. First I see tons of pictures of them together. In some they are hand in hand and suddenly the pictures are dark so I had to lean forward. I gasped as I made them out, Jose and Elena in an embrace. What the fuck. "So he was cheating on me then."

"On both of us, she is now trying to get me to support a child that is probably not mine. She has not been my sub in months. Since I met you.

I turned my head to look at him, "really?"

"Yes Ana since I met you I haven't wanted anyone else. I released Elena and have been by myself worried sick over you."

"I am so sorry I had no idea."

"How could you? I didn't tell you, you asked and I lied."

"Yeah why did you do that?"

"You were hurting enough and I didn't want to be just a rebound for you."

"Christian, look at me." I ran my hands down his face as I stared into his blue-gray eyes. "You have been special to me since that first night. You touched something deep inside me and you could never be just a rebound for me. I want to be with you and love you forever."

"I feel that same way about you but this is not going to be easy. I have never done the relationship thing."

"I have never been good at the relationship thing; we will learn together and do it our way?"

With a grin plastered on his face Christian nodded to me, "Yes, but look at the time. Let's go back to bed; we can plot more in the morning."

Squealing loudly as he picked up I clung to him kissing his neck as he carried me back to his room. "Ana, Ana, Ana, stop that. You are making it hard not to attack you."

"Maybe that is the point."

"Ok no talk about points Ms. Steele." He laughed as he sat down on the bed pushing me out of his arms.

"Okay alright fine I will be a good girl."

"Much better."

Then curled up in his arms I drift off into a deep sleep that leaves me almost dead to the world until I feel Christian gently shaking me awake. "Ana lazy girl, get up."

"Huh? Shit what time is it?"

"It is after 10:00. Take a shower baby and get dressed, after we eat I have some things planned."

"Yes bossy boy." I tossed a pillow his way but he dodged it.

"Bad girl or wait, log me into your face book first. I want to check some things."

"For our slap back at them?"

"Exactly." I nodded then followed him to his office. As I log him in I see copies of the pictures of me on his desk.

"Are you having these framed?"

With laughter he shook his head, "No but I like that thought. Only with your permission."

"No way, burn them."

"After we get the negatives or the camera destroyed I will."

"You need them for proof?"

"Yes now go and shower."

Back in his room I headed to shower letting the hot water run over me as I sighed in relief. First time in so long I was safe and I was not afraid or beating myself up for something. As I thought I realized that I had to figure out how to deal with get my shot this time without him knowing.

After getting dressed I wandered out to notice the whole house smelt delicious. Downstairs I found Christian barefoot and cooking, "Oh wow he cooks too? You are the total package."

"Is that so?" He laughed, "There is the Ana I first met."

"You always did like me mouthy."

"Yes I love that bratty side of you."

"Okay dork, so I am starving. Food done yet?"

"Patience brat."

Laughing hard I sat down to watch him, "Okay fine but then you said we have plans today?"

With two plates in hand Christian sat down next to me then put the plates down. "Yes I am worried about your nightmares so I got Flynn to fit you in."

"Flynn?"

"Dr. Flynn, he is going to help you so you can sleep. You keep screaming my name like you can't find me in the middle of the night."

"I know I dream that either you are gone or they scared you away."

"Well that is not going to happen so eat up because we will be having a visitor quick before we head to Flynn's office."

"Who?" I asked as I grabbed my fork.

"Well, now do not freak but I called an ob/gyn that I know and she is stopping by to give you that shot you missed."

"OH YOU DID WHAT?" I stared at him shocked, "how did you know that?"

"Your messages with Jose on face book and your texts. Ana I didn't mean to anger you."

"Well I don't know what to say now. I guess thank you but please ask me first next time."

"I will I promise, I just wanted to get that taken care of so..." He stopped talking then looked down.

"So we can maybe finally?" I grinned at him then laughed hard, "okay okay I am not mad but I don't want you doing that again. I will handle those issues myself."

"Deal now eat would you? I slaved for you."

"Oh gez." I rolled my eyes at him then grinned at his reaction. "Don't like when I do that?"

"Do you like to be spanked?"

I dropped my fork as I heard him, "Um sometimes, why?"

"Roll your eyes again and find out?"

"You want to spank me for that?" I whispered breathlessly at him.

"Yes more than you know."

"Won't that lead to...?"

"It might so do not roll your eyes at me again today."

I nodded then finished eating peeking up at him now and then with a grin on my face. "I will remember that when I want to get you going."

"Please do Ana." He winked my way then got up, "I cooked, and you clean."

"Yes sir." I hopped up and cleaned up the kitchen as he disappeared.

Before I could wander around there was a knock at the door and Dr. Greene stepped inside. Christian introduced us then vanished so we could talk. She seemed very nice and put me right at ease but then she mentioned doing another pregnancy test. "But I did one and it was negative."

"I have your shot here but every time a woman is late I test before I give it just to be safe. If you were pregnant the shot would harm the baby."

"Fine, give it here." I took the cup from her and groaned. As she did the test I found myself leaning over willing it to be negative again.

"Ana relax, look it is negative. Now roll up your sleeve, one quick little pinch and you are done." I nodded then a few minutes later I walked her out with her card in my hand. "I will have my office give you a reminder call 2 weeks before your next shot Ana."

"Thank you, I do not want to miss that again."

Christian popped out in the hallway as I turned around, "ready to go bare your soul to Flynn now?"

"If you think it will help then yes."

"I do, you need to let good of the past."

Heading off in his car I leaned back feeling more relaxed than I had the day before as I grinned over at him. He was flipping through the songs on his radio. "Looking for something?"

"Yes yesterday you were telling me songs to play for us but I have one for you today." Eyeing him curiously I just watched him, "No trying to sing either, just listen to the lyrics."

As the song starts I saw him gaze over at me with such a look of love that I felt weak then I let myself get lost as the song played.

"Well let me tell you a story

About a girl and a boy

He fell in love with his best friend

When she's around, he feels nothing but joy

But she was already broken, and it made her blind

But she could never believe that love would ever treat her right

But did you know that I love you? or were you not aware?

You're the smile on my face

And I ain't going nowhereI'm here to make you happy,

I'm here to see you smile

I've been wanting to tell you this for a long while.

What's gonna make you fall in love

I know you got your wall wrapped all the way around your heart

Don't have to be scared at all, oh my love

But you can't fly unless you let ya,

You can't fly unless you let yourself fall

Well I can tell you're afraid of what this might do

Cause we got such an amazing friendship and that you don't wanna lose

Well I don't wanna lose it either

I don't think I can stay sitting around while you're hurting babe

So take my hand

Well did you know you're an angel?

who forgot how to fly

Did you know that it breaks my heart every time to see you cry

Cause I know that a piece of you's gone every time he done wrong,

I'm the shoulder you're crying on

And I hope by the time that I'm done with this song that I've figured out

Who's gonna make you fall in love

I know you got your wall wrapped all the way around your heart

Don't have to be scared at all, oh my love

But you can't fly unless you let ya,

You can't fly unless you let yourself fall

I will catch you if you fall

I will catch you if you fall

I will catch you if you fall

But if you spread your wings

You can fly away with me

But you can't fly unless you let ya,

You can't fly unless you let yourself.

What's gonna make you fall in love

I know you got your wall wrapped all the way around your heart

Don't have to be scared at all, oh my love

But you can't fly unless you let ya,

You can't fly unless you let

Yourself fall in love

I know you got your wall wrapped all the way around your heart

Don't have to be scared at all, oh my love

But you can't fly unless you let ya,

You can't fly unless you let yourself fall

I will catch you if you fall

I will catch you if you fall

I will catch you if you fall

If you spread your wings

You can fly away with me

But you can't fly unless you let ya,

Let yourself fall."

As the song ended I just stared at him, "I have never heard that before, play it again please."

"You like it then?"

"No I love it, it is very you and me."

"I agree, makes me think of you. And in the interest of helping my broken angel here we are."

I turned to look, just a big building but I was dreading going inside. Was I going to have to go through it all? Could I get through it all without losing it? There was only one way to find out.

Once inside we were lead straight into a private room. I squeezed Christian's hand and whispered, "I don't know if I can do this."

"You can and you should, you need to be able to sleep Ana."

"Just don't leave me."

"You want me here for this?"

"Yes there is nothing I want to hide from you and I am scared."

"Okay, I will not leave you."

We both looked up as a man entered the room. Tall with dark hair and glasses he sat down across from us, "Hello Christian, I assume this is the Ms. Steele that you demanded I fit in today?"

I blushed and then elbowed Christian, "you should not have done that."

"Bullshit Ana you keep screaming in your sleep. You need to figure out why."

Dr. Flynn looked at us and laughed, "Okay I see you two have quite a relationship here. Not many people talk back to Christian like that."

"She is a brat but I love that about her."

I see Dr. Flynn's eyes widen, "Christian what did you say?"

"You heard me and we will discuss that later. Help Ana now please. She keeps dreaming that she cannot find me."

"Very well Christian if you would excuse us then Ana and I will get started."

"Please I want him here with me."

"Are you sure Ana? I want you to be able to share your thoughts freely with me here."

"I hide nothing from him; I want him to know all the things about me."

"It is settled then, as the lady wishes."

"Thank you." I squeezed Christian's hand then tried to relax as the questions started.

"I see, so Ana you are having nightmares?"

"Yes. The last two nights."

"Do you remember anything of them?" He started taking notes as I speak.

"Yes I am all alone when they start and I cannot find Christian."

"You said alone when they start, not at the end?"

"No either my ex or another person is chasing me or I am arguing with them."

"About what?"

With burning red cheeks I sighed, "I was his sub first then became his girlfriend but we were never happy after that."

"Why do you think that was?"

"He didn't want to be in a relationship with me, he just wanted to continue our submissive/dominant agreement but I could not."

"So he was your Dominant then?"

"Yes."

"Did you enjoy being his submissive."

"At first I did. I was not looking for anything serious."

"That changed then?"

"It did, I missed that feeling of being loved and not just feeling like a pet."

I noticed Dr. Flynn glance over at Christian as we talked and I wondered what he was thinking knowing that Christian was a Dom too but I didn't get a chance to ask as the questions continued on. We talked about how I hated being just one of the many, how I wanted and needed more that and then Flynn hit the question I never thought. "Ana did you think that if he was with only you that if might change your relationship, that he would change for you?"

I swallowed then shrugged, "I don't know maybe."

"I think you were hoping it would change but then instead you found yourself lost. So in the end, why did you leave him?"

"He pushed me over the edge. He crossed a line that even would have broken our sub/dom contract."

"What did he do?"

"He treated me like property and shared me with a friend." I choked out in tears by this time as I felt Christian's hand tighten on mine.

"Ana, you won't like to hear this but I think I see part of the problem here. Do you think his actions were your fault?"

"Fuck no there were not." I heard Christian growl.

Dr. Flynn frowned at him then looked my way, "Ana I need to hear an answer from you, do you blame yourself for what he did to you?"


	12. Chapter 12

**Against All Odds- Chapter 12**

"Yes I do, I guess maybe if I had not pushed him for too much then he would not have reacted like he did."

Dr. Flynn frowned at me and put down his notes as he sighed, "Ana there is the root of your nightmares. You feel responsible for hurting him and in turn, you think that because you hurt him he hurt you."

Christian shifted next to me, and then he squeezed my hand as I spoke. "Well he said that he had the answer to our problems. He was trying to make me happy."

"Ana." I heard a stern tone in Christian's voice as he interrupted us, "You know that he crossed the line with that stunt. He used you and he is still trying to use you."

"I am hearing that you two have discussed this but I am concerned Ana that you need to find a way to forgive yourself. All you did was love someone, yes it did not work out but not all relationships do. Now this also concerns me that it sounds like the relationship is not entirely over?"

"It is over on my end; Jose is the one that is announcing to the world that I am pregnant."

"He did that?" Flynn shook his head and then looked at his watch. "Our hour is up for today but Ana I want to see you again tomorrow if possible. Tonight I want you to work on forgiving yourself."

"I can do tomorrow and I will try but that might be hard."

"Yes it will be but you have to realize that he is the one responsible for hurting you and I know you said in your dreams you keep looking for Christian and you cannot find him. We will discuss that tomorrow. For tonight just try to think positively of yourself and your actions."

Nodding to him I peeked over to see Christian staring at me. His face tells it all, his love for me shows in the soft but protective way he is watching me. It made me blush which caught his eye. With a flirty grin he winked at him then said good bye to Dr. Flynn.

As soon as we were out of his office Christian swept me into his arms and hugged me tightly. "You did well Ana; I hope he can help you. I do not like to see you like you are when you have your nightmares. It breaks my heart because I feel helpless."

"But you are the only one who can calm me." I stared up at him before kissing his lips softly right there in the office waiting room. "Christian Grey you have already been more helpful to me in the short time I have known you than anyone else in my whole life."

"Maybe because I love you more than anyone else in your life ever has?

"Maybe."

"Come Ms. Steele, let's go and see if I can find us someplace you would like to eat for lunch."

"Oh you, I think you will manage. You do seem to know all the things that I love."

With another wink to me Christian led us to his car and we headed off to have lunch. Sitting across from him I was still in awe of this man. He gave to me everything without question and without asking for a thing back. Never had I known anyone like him.

As we ate I had to ask him, "Christian, I don't want to offend you but I want you to know that I plan on someday trying to repay you for all you are doing for me. Would you object to that?"

"Yes Ana I would. I. Love. You. That is why I am doing these things, no repayment is necessary."

"Nothing I can do?"

"Well there is one thing you can do for me."

"Anything."

"You can tell me that you love me again."

"I love you Mr. Grey."

He grinned at me as if I had just told him he had won the lottery and it made me giggle. "See that is all I need; now I am a very happy man."

"If that is all you want I will just have to tell you each and every day."

"Do that and I will be the happiest man alive."

"Oh you, you are always the flatterer. I do love you Christian, and not just for all the things you are doing for me but for just loving me."

"I have loved you since the first time we met."

"You loved that Ana? The confident, sexy one right?"

"Yes the one I am staring at right now."

"I think you bring her out of me, she was hiding out before I met you."

"Not for too long I hope." He grinned at me, "she makes the world a much brighter place."

"Oh gez Mr. Grey have you had a bit too much wine? Perhaps I should drive us back to your place?'

"I am fine Ms. Steele but brat I thank you for your concern. Hey who said a thing about going back to my place?"

"Well I just assumed."

"No way, I want to take you shopping."

"Shopping?"

"Yes Ana perhaps you have heard of the concept. You go to a place that sells things and you pick out what you like."

"Yes dork, I know what shopping is. I just don't do it much."

"Why?"

I shrugged, "no money?"

"Then you are in luck, I am paying. Let's go."

"No way, you want to pay for my clothes too?"

"Yes then if I happen to rip something off you I won't feel guilty."

"WHAT?" I choked on my last sip of water and stared at him. "Christian!"

"Ana please, I know I have been good so far but that won't last much longer."

"Well you have 7 days till my shot has us free and clear."

"I think I can work around that."

"Fine let's go. Take me shopping."

Dragging me out to all these fancy store Christian seemed to light up as he made me try on dress after dress and shoes to match. I laughed at him and was soon having so much fun I forgot to care that he was paying for it all. We were just the brat and the dork having fun. Shopping was never so interesting.

Then he picked up the most gorgeous red dress I had ever seen. Looking at myself in the dressing room mirror I saw an Ana I had not seen in a long time. Her face was lit up and she looked so happy. Then as I walked out the look on Christian's face told me exactly how amazing I looked in it.

He cleared his throat loudly then announced to the sales lady who was helping us, "Sold."

Laughing softly I walked closer to kiss him, "I love this one, not sure I want to take it off."

"Well then don't. I was planning to take you out tonight anyway. Leave it on if you want."

"Take me out where?"

"I have something planned."

"Hello there Christian."

Still in his arms I peeked over his shoulder to see who it was, oh fuck Elena. Christian bristled at the sound of her greeting but didn't show it. He whispered to me as he kissed my cheek. "Do not let her see you get worked up. Go and change. I will be waiting for you."

"Won't you introduce your girlfriend to your new friend?" Elena pushed her way closer to us and stood looking at me curiously. "Don't I know you?"

"Elena, this is my girlfriend Ana." He was back in full control as he let me go and then winked at me. "Ana get changed; we don't want to be late."

"Christian I am your girlfriend and mother of your child remember?" I heard Elena hiss at him as I walked back to the dressing room.

Changing quickly as I listened I could make out Christian's voice stern and low. "Address yourself as that again Elena and you won't have to worry about me supporting either you or this baby of yours. I will forget that I know you."

"You would not dare, you would forget your own child?"

"Elena last time, listen closely. That is not my child; until I see a DNA test I will not acknowledge it or you. Do. You. Understand?"

I peeked my head out not wanting to be seen but the sales lady quickly came my way, "Are you done Ms.?"

"Um yeah, here are what we are getting."

Christian takes my hand and pulled me with him to pay. Elena walked off but I could still feel her eyes on me. "Ana you changed out of the red dress?"

"Oh yes I did, I want to get all ready before I put it back on."

After signing his name quickly Christian eyed me. Grabbing the bags with one hand his other hand rubbed my back gently pushing me towards the door. Outside in the car he looked over at me, "that is not why you changed. Please don't let her ruin our night."

"I won't but that kind of killed the mood."

"Well let me fix that." He leaned over to kiss me then as he drove he turned on the radio singing along with me.

Back at his place Christian disappears into his office while I went through my new clothes. It had not seemed like so much in the stores but as I pulled it out I was shocked by it all. I haven't bought this many clothes in one trip ever. I started to fold things and just as I was wondering where to put them he popped his head into the room.

"You can have half of the closet space and here let me make you room in the dresser." He slipped past me to start rearranging his drawers.

"Really? Just like that?"

"Of course, I want you to have room for your things."

"So you want me to live here with you?"

"I thought you already were?"

I laughed hard at that, "Well I guess I am but we didn't make it official. I don't have a key."

"Ms. Steele difficult as ever." He disappeared from the room then came back with a single key on a keychain with a silver heart dangling from it. "I was going to give you this later but you are so impatient. Here is your key, Ana Steele will you move in with me? I want your lovely face to be the last thing I see every night and the first thing every morning."

"Oh Christian." My eyes teared up and I had to reach over to hug him as I took the keychain. "YES! I would love to be your roomie."

"Just so you know I expect that to be roomie with benefits." He grinned at me.

"BAD YOU! But.." I grinned back, "We might be able to arrange that.

"Okay so I will leave you to put your clothes away but oh pack a small overnight bag. I am taking my roomie for a sleepover someplace else tonight."

"But you have already done so much..."

My words are cut off by his finger over my lips, "shush and get ready. Be ready to leave in an hour red dressed up baby."

"Yes Sir." I nodded then shoved him out of the room as I started to get ready.

Exactly an hour later I was ready and waiting in the living room dressed in the red dress with my hair piled up in curls. I was so nervous, this would be our first official date but as soon as he walked in the room in his black suit I just grinned. He looked so handsome and he was mine. All mine!

"Wow Mr. Grey you do know how to make an entrance."

"Shush now Ms. Steele, I am still stunned by the sight of you right here, right now."

Without another word he swept me into his arms kissing me hard. As we got tangled in that kiss I forgot everything else letting my tiny clutch fall to the floor as I wrapped my arms around him pulling him closer. I don't know how long we kissed but suddenly Christian pushed me back gently.

You keep that up and we won't leave this house tonight."

"Okay I will stop but you started it."

"Yes I did but now I am ending it. Ana…" His eyes were shining bright as he looked at me, "Do you trust me?"

He put one hand into his pocket and pulled out a black silk blindfold, I eyed him then nodded slowly, "I do trust you."

"I want this to be a complete surprise." He gently put the blindfold on me trying not to mess up my hair. "Okay now let me lead you."

I held onto his hand tightly as he led me outside and helped me into the car but I sensed this was different. I was in the backseat then suddenly I heard the door across from me open and Christian slipped in. "Hey you are not driving?"

"Not tonight I wanted to have my hands free...for this."

Then one of his hands ran up my neck pulling my head back gently as his lips brushed my neck. I immediately reached for him but he pushed my hands away. "No touching Ms. Steele, just lie back and let me take care of you."

Music came on then and the sweet sounds of Ne-Yo filled the car. I got lost in the songs and his kisses which started soft and then grew harder and deeper as he traveled up one side of my neck to my jaw. As his kisses moved to my lips I felt him pressing hard to force open my mouth. Then the tip of his tongue brushed mine as we started to melt into each other.

Again I started to bring my hands towards him but this time he grabbed both my wrists in one of his hands putting them over my head, "Ana I said no." Another hard kiss pushed his tongue back inside my mouth and I forgot to try to touch him as we let our kisses deepened until I was moaning for more.

"Christian." My breathe was coming harder and all I could think of was the heat growing in me. I wanted him so much. "Christian." I repeated as I moaned.

"Patience baby, all good things come to those who wait." His hand tightened that was holding both of my wrists as he started kissing my neck again while his other hand started to explore me over my dress starting at my breasts. As his hand glided over my nipples I closed my eyes tight under the blindfold and pressed my legs together then I heard him whisper to me, "did I just make you wet?"

"Yes." I whispered to him feeling my cheeks burning red.

"Good but have to wait for later to do more, we are here."

"What?" Don't tease me, please touch me." I heard myself beg as I pressed my legs together tighter.

"So you don't want your surprise?"

"I do but I want you."

"What if I am part of the surprise?"

"Fine, show me."

"I plan to show you a great many things Ana all starting tonight."

I felt the car stop then Christian got out of the car and came over to my side. He still left me blindfolded as he helped me out. As we walked I felt a cool breeze brush over my shoulders and then he helped me step up. "Whoa." I said as I lurched forward. Wherever we were, it was moving.

His lips brushed over mine before he whispered, "Are you ready to see your surprise now?"

"Yes I am."

I closed my eyes in anticipation as I felt him start to untie my blindfold.


	13. Chapter 13

**Against All Odds- Chapter 13**

As the blindfold came off my eyes I blinked the bright sunlight blinded me at first. Christian's hands were on my arms holding me steady as I looked around. We were on a beautiful boat, the largest I had ever seen let alone been on. "Is this yours?"

"Yes it is. Do you like it?"

"I have never been on a boat like this but I do. Show me more?"

"Gladly Ms. Steele but first." He kissed my lips softly then knelt down next to me. "These shoes go so well with your dress but not with the rocking of a boat on the waves." As he ran the fingers of one of his hands over my right ankle I shivered. Then with a smirk he carefully removed my heels one at a one. "There now you will be safer, come on Ana I will give you the grand tour."

The boat was so large, we walked from the front to the back where there was a man standing by a large wheel. Christian greeted him and then took my hand leading me down some stairs. There was a whole apartment in there, in the kitchen I saw a few bottles of wine and food spread out waiting for us. "What do you think?"

Turning around I laughed, "I think I am overwhelmed. I love it though, what is behind these doors?"

"There are a few bedrooms in there and each one has its own bathroom." He led me into the middle door where a large bedroom with a king-size bed was. I grinned looking at him as I peeked into the adjoining bathroom.

"Is this where we are spending the night?"

"Yes I thought it might be a nice getaway. No TVs, no cells...we are unreachable to the rest of the world here."

"Unreachable again, but this time with you. I like that."

"Yes unreachable just us and I want to talk to you about what happened. Ana, please do not ever leave like that again. My heart broke while you were gone."

"Christian..."

My words are cut off by a kiss. His lips brush over mine lightly at first but then grow harder and more demanding as I feel him start to walk making me move with him until I feel the bed behind my knees. "Sit down Ana." I sat down as he sat down next to me staring at me with such love that it made me breathless. "I want to talk before we head out, I want you. I want you so bad that I have to fight not to push you down and take you right now but I want you to know about me before we get in too deep. Please just listen."

Nodding I took hold of his hands in mine as I gazed up studying his blue-grey eyes as he spoke. "I am a Dom like Jose or I was but with you I want something different. Ana I want something more." He pulled one hand out of mine to run his fingers down my cheek. "The way I feel about you it scares me. When you disappeared Ana I was ready to go over and beat Jose until he told me where you were. I was lost without you. Everyday I had them check again for your cell phone signal but there was nothing."

As he spoke I noticed tears running down his cheeks and I whispered to him, "I am so sorry that I hurt you. I guess it never occurred to me that you would miss me."

"Ana did you not hear the things I said to you over and over?"

"But when I asked you, you said no."

"I said no because I was hearing you tell me how you loved Jose enough to stay with him. What would you have done if I had said yes I loved you?"

"I...I don't know but from the moment I met you Christian I have had this feeling. Something about you drew me to you."

"I know I felt it too, we are drawn together and I will never let you go but Ana, I have never done a real relationship. I want to try with you."

His words warmed my heart as I started to cry myself, "I want you and I will take whatever you are willing to give me. I have never been very good at relationships; maybe we can make up our own rules and learn together?"

"I like that sounds of that, so let's head out. I want to spend a night with you under the stars where no one in the world can bother us."

"That sounds like quite the first date Mr. Grey."

"Our first date had to be special just like you Ms. Steele, come on."

He led me back up to the deck and then he called me over to introduce to me to Mac. Mac seemed like a very good man and I sat back watching them in awe as they got the boat out of the marina and into the open water. Leaning back I grinned as I felt the wind blow through my hair and I watched Christian.

He was everything I had always wanted, he loved me and he wanted to protect me from the world. Not only that he wanted to give me things he never gave anyone before...that made me love him more. Many times I had said I love you in the past but now each time I said it those words took on new meaning for me. I was finally saying them to someone who loved me as much as I loved him.

After the boat was moving along Christian called me over to the wheel with him and started to explain what things were to me. He was lit up like a happy child showing me his favorite toy. I listened intently and helped him steer. We went along like that for a while then suddenly they turned off the engines and pulled down the sails.

"Why did we stop?"

"Because love this is far enough out that no one will bother us but close enough that Mac can make it back on his own safely."

I turned to see Mac wave as he climbed down into a small motorboat that I had not noticed. He left then Christian pulled me back to him, "Let's drop the anchor and have our dinner on deck as we watch the sun set."

He brought up a blanket and a huge basket. We sat down and we like two kids as we dug through it stopping to feed each other a bite of this or that then he poured two glasses of wine. Handing me a glass he motioned for me to move closer so I leaned against his chest as I took my glass. "Here is to us and to you, my perfect love."

"Christian you flatter me. I am not perfect. The only perfect thing I ever did was come back and run straight to you. I will always thank fates that I did that." I reached up with my other hand to run my fingers down his face as I stared into his eyes. "I never dreamed love would be like this, you have shown me a whole different kind of love in just these past few days."

He grabbed my hand in his and played with my fingers. ''You are perfect. To me.'' He looked up at me. ''I'm glad you came back. I'm glad you came to me. I never thought I would ever know what true love was. But, with you, it helped me to figure love is perfect with that one amazing person. Love with you is sweet, pure, and wonderful.''

With tears in my eyes I lifted my glass to his and as we clicked them together I whispered to him, "To our love may it last forever and always."

Sitting on deck as the sun faded from a shimmering orange to a dusky rose we cuddled and whispered for what much have been hours. We never ran out of things to talk about from our silly jokes to each other to our mock arguments over who loved who most then the sky darkened even more to a deep purple and Christian announced it was time to go below deck.

My heart skipped a beat as we walked down those stairs knowing that this was it, the moment that I would be able to let loose of all the feelings and emotions that I had been holding in check since the moment we first met. "Christian." I whispered his name making him turn to me just as I launched myself at him kissing him hard. Each kiss I opened up more letting loose the passion that had been building for so long and soon we were both breathless kissing and pawing at each other's clothing.

"Ana, you are sure? It is not too soon?" He whispered to me between kisses as his hands found the zipper on the back of my dress.

"If I said it was?"

"Then I would hold you and be content."

"Wait." I stopped and pushed myself back to look up at him. "You would do that for me?"

"That and so many things, you have no idea what I am willing to do for you."

"Well there are many things I am willing to do for you as well and right now I want to show you how much I love you."

"Show me how?"

Without words I answered him with hard kisses while I pushed him back towards the bedroom until this time it was him standing with his legs against the bed as I whispered, "Sit down Christian."

"Why Ms. Steele, are you trying to seduce me?"

"Maybe I am Mr. Grey. Is it working?"

Taking my hand Christian placed it against his pants where I could feel him hard and ready for me. "You have had me enchanted and wanting you for a while, I can take you now or wait Ana ...it is all up to you."

My fingers ran up and down his erection lightly brushing him through his pants as I whispered to him, "I don't want to wait anymore. We have already had to wait for so long. I want to be yours in all ways."

"In all ways? What do you mean?"

I laughed at the look on his face, "Oh gez perv, I meant heart, body and soul. You have my heart and my soul; I want to give you my body."

"Then let me take it."

With those words Christian swept me into his arms kissing me and I felt my dress fall down as he quickly unzipped it but he left on the corset and panties I had on underneath as he picked me up putting me down on the bed. I watched him remove his shirt but nothing more as he came back at him with kisses that soon had me panting and pushing my body against his.

"Christian."

"Ana, I want you in the worst way but I want to take this slow." His hands brushed down my face as he kissed me again. "Just relax and stay on your back...let me love you."

My mind spun at that, who would argue with that? I lay back and leaned my head to the side as I watched Christian explore me inch by inch. His fingers ran over the edges of my corset just brushing over my breasts and nipples which were straining to be free of the fabric and naked to his touch but he didn't undress me any further just continued exploring lower and lower until his hand was between my legs.

"You are very ready and eager." He whispered to me as his fingers brushed over my damp panties which were getting wetter and wetter each second he teased me and make my body tingle with anticipation.

"I am." I whispered back wanting to push my hand over his to make him give me more and as if he read my mind suddenly his palm came down hard on my clit making me moan loudly.

"I think you like that." He moved his hand then suddenly palmed my clit again a bit harder.

"Oh fuck, yes I do."

"Such language Ms. Steele. Although I do like being the one to make you swear and your cheeks flushed bright red." He palmed me again and then again before suddenly moving his hands off me as I groaned in protest. "Don't worry love I am far from done with you."

His hands moved from between my legs back to my breasts tugging and teasing each nipple until they were hard. I was moaning louder and louder wanting more. As Christian started kissing me again I was lost. Each kiss, each touch and each moment with him I was falling deeper and deeper and wanting more and more. I wanted this moment between us to never end but I also wanted more. I wanted and needed to be one with him.

My whole body was burning, writhing and begging for him as he suddenly stopped kissing me and moved to sit between my legs tugging at my panties. Once they were gone the cool air over my wetness made me shiver until I felt his fingers as he drug them slowly back and forth over my clit. His name escaped my legs as my arms reached for him. I knew I could not wait much longer.

"Ana, do you know how much I want you?" I heard Christian whisper as his fingers toyed with me. First he just traced over my clit then I felt them start to enter me slowly at first then moving harder and faster until I arched my back pushing up off the bed back at him.

"Christian, I want you so much too." I moaned at him as my body started to shake from his sweet touch. "Please." I begged as I felt myself growing wetter still.

"Tell me what you want."

"You, I want you."

"Well Ms. Steele I aim to please."

I closed my eyes as he moved from the bed to finish undressing then as I opened them I stared at the perfection of him. He came at me kissing me hard again and again as I felt him pushing at with his erection. As the tip of him slipped into me for the first time I gasped out his name and clutched his shoulder staring into his eyes.

Higher and higher our love making took me that night and never had I had such a night. I came undone over and over under him as he loved me. It was so different than, more loving and more intense than ever before and each time I called out his name it was like it spurred him on. All the time waiting was worth each second as in one night he made me feel more alive than I had ever before. Hours later satisfied and still tangled up in each other I drifted off in his arms feeling the gentle rocking of the boat and the soft moments of his chest under me.


	14. Chapter 14

**Against All Odds- Chapter 14**

"So you never fucked him huh?" I heard from the darkness behind me making me turn in circles but I saw no one there. "How was he, is he a good fuck?

Now I recognized the voice and without looking or moving I fire back, "No, I never fucked him. We made love which is something you and I never did."

"The fuck we didn't." His voice growled getting louder as he moved closer to me.

"The one time I tried you started and stopped. You only wanted me when you could control me."

"Do not back talk to me Ana."

"Oh fuck you Jose, show yourself..."

Suddenly out of the shadows he appeared, his green eyes stared at me with loathing, "I said do not back talk me."

"And I said fuck you! You do not control me anymore."

"You think your new owner will protect you from me?"

"First of all Christian is not my Dom and yes he will."

"He is a Dom, once a Dom always one. You wait and see."

"FUCK YOU!" In a brave moment I swung my fist at his face but he dodged the blow.

Then he grabbed my arm pushing me against the wall. "Ana you hit me and I will hit you back remember that."

His hands started to slide over my breasts as I started screaming. "DO NOT TOUCH ME!"

"ANA!" I turn my head as I hear Christian's voice calling my name over and over getting louder as I thrash against Jose's hold on me. "Ana damn it, wake up baby."

I blinked my eyes open and looked up into Christian's face. "Christian?" I looked around confused, "where am I?"

"You are with me and safe baby. Remember we are on the boat?"

"Oh yes." I grinned at him as I remembered where we were and pulled him down to me. "I remember now, it is just you and me." Running my hands over his chest I whispered to him, "I dreamed that Jose was asking me about you."

"What else happened? You were shouting for a while there." He pushed the sweaty hair off my hair as he listened to me.

"He was giving me shit about you and said something about you being my new owner."

"I do not now or ever will I own you Ana. We are equals."

"I know and I shouted that at him then I tried to hit him."

"That is when you woke me up then your arm moved and you nearly hit me." He laughed then kissed me.

After kissing him back I laughed, "Oh damn sorry baby."

"Is that all that happened?"

My eyes darkened as I swallowed hard, "No he came at me that is when you woke me up."

"Oh Ana, when will you see that you are safe now?" He kissed me hard pulling me near. "Feel me, touch me and know that I will protect you with my own life if needed. He will never get near you again, that I promise you Ana."

In his arms my body quickly responded to his nearness and I silenced him with hard demanding kisses. "Show me again your love."

His answer was to kiss me back as he pushed me on my back. As we joined together as one again I heard his words, "You. Are. Mine." His breath came faster as he started to move harder and deeper into me. "Now and always Ana, I will love you and protect you with all that I am."

The combination of his words and his movements had me moaning as I let go completely. Shattered in his arms I cried out his name as he collapsed forward in my arms while he released deep inside me. Then in each other's arms we drifted back to sleep.

Hours later I woke up to find my body still tangled with his. Grinning widely I pulled my arms tighter around him. "Hey, don't squeeze."

"Oh no?" I laughed squeezing him harder.

"Ms. Steele, are you trying to start something?"

"Maybe Mr. Grey, I like starting things with you."

Just then my stomach rumbled making me laugh, "I heard that, you need to eat and we need to head back. You have an appointment remember?"

"Awww no, I want to start more things with you. Forget food."

"Ana stop; we have all the time in the world for that but if you almost hit me again in your sleep we will have problems." He kissed me but then gave me a stern look. "I want you to sleep peacefully in my arms without having to worry you might give me a black eye."

Giggling at that I nodded, "Fine let's get up. I am hungry."

Sitting up on deck we ate as the wind blew and the sun shone down on us. "I love this boat; being lost with you has been wonderful Mr. Grey."

"I agree. We should get lost again and often." Christian grinned at me as I noticed a little motorboat approaching and realized its Mac coming back.

"Is that why we needed to get up?"

"Did you want him to hear you screaming?"

"Oh um no." I laughed then finished eating as Christian helped Mac back onboard. This time I got to be at the wheel while they raised the sails. The sun and the wind as the boat sailed across the water made me grin. When Christian came up behind me I turned to kiss him. "You like being on the boat I see?" I nodded then kissed him again. "Hey no distracting the sailor Ms. Steele. You might get us lost at sea."

"I would be happy lost with you Mr. Grey."

"I know baby." His grin made me grin back. All too soon our ride ended and we were back at the marina. As he docked the boat Christian called out to me, "you ready to head off to see Flynn?"

"Yes I am. Then lunch?"

My answer was a big grin while he nodded at me. Our good mood continued as we drove to Dr. Flynn's office blasting music and trying to sing over each other.

As we pulled up to the office both of our cells started to go off. Christian studied his intently while I ignored mine. "WTF!" I heard him say.

"What is it?"

He handed me his cell and I saw picture after picture of me had been sent to him from an unknown number. I cringed; there were pictures that I had not seen before. Jack is in some of them and my blood ran cold as I started to cry.

"Ana, no baby do not cry. We will get back at them both. Here you head in to see Flynn; I want to start to deal with this."

"Okay." I sighed, I wanted him there with me but I just climbed out of the car slowly.

"Ana?"

"Yes?" I turned back to look at him.

"You are strong baby; you do not need me there to hold your hand. I will be in as soon as I can."

Inside the office I was quickly taken into the private room. Dr. Flynn walked in and first thing he noticed was Christian was missing, "Hello again Ana, I see you are alone today. Did you want to speak privately now?"

I shook my head, "No, but Christian is dealing with some issues."

"I see. You seem troubled by this. Is everything alright?"

"Long story short, my ex is continuing to try to black mail me. He sent some pictures that I did not know he took of me to Christian."

"Why don't you involve the police? That is something you could sue him over."

"Those pictures are not something I want the world or a courtroom full of others to see."

"I see, so Christian is handling that. Let us see how you are, any nightmares last night?"

"Yes but it was different than the others."

"Tell me how."

"In this dream it was just me and Jose, I stood up for myself and even tried to hit him but I missed."

"How did you feel in the dream about that?"

"It felt good to let him know that I was not going to just take his shit anymore but he still threatened me. He had a hold of me that was when Christian woke me up."

"Ana it sounds like you are still not resolved in your issues with your ex. What would you say to him if you could confront him?"

Leaning back on the couch I frowned, "I don't want to ever see or talk to him again."

"Yes Ana I know that but you have built up feelings that you need to release so for this exercise, let me be Jose. Tell me what you would if you could confront him."

"I will try." I closed my eyes and pictured Jose. Then I opened them trying to get it all out. "Jose, you never wanted to love me. I know that now, I wish I had never fucking met you. I let you have control of me because I had given up on myself. I thought that I didn't deserve love or I would never find it again. I sold my body, heart and soul to you because you were willing to take it." I stopped as the tears flooded down my face.

Flynn stared at me then nodded, "Anything else?"

"YES! I want you to leave me alone, I do deserve to be happy, I do deserve to be loved as I love and I do deserve to be left in peace. You are dead in my eyes so FUCK OFF!" I screamed out then collapsed back on the couch sobbing just as Christian walked in.

"Ana?" He rushed over to me then glared at Flynn. "What are you doing to her? Ana baby I heard your screaming in the lobby."

"Just an exercise Christian." Dr. Flynn wrote some notes then looked up at me as I sobbed in Christian's arms. "Ana, did that feel good? To finally get it out?"

"Yes and no." I sighed holding onto Christian. "I just don't want to even see him again."

Christian stiffened at that making me look at him, "Christian?"

"He wants to see you."

"WHAT?" I pushed at him but he held me tightly. I forget that Dr. Flynn was in the room as I started to rage.

"I do not give a fuck what he wants. WAIT! Did you talk to him?"

Without a word Christian handed me his cell phone so I can read the messages. I heard a door close and realized that we were now alone as I paged through the messages. It started with one from Christian back to the unknown number. "To whoever sent these to me, you should know that I plan to trace this and you will be found. The pictures will be handed over and destroyed."

"Why would I give them up?"

"You violated her privacy taking those. You will hand them over."

"Grey you do not order me."

"It appears that I am. You will hand them over one way or another."

"So do you enjoy my sloppy seconds?"

"I will not talk about her to you."

"Yet you are fighting her battles for her."

"You brought me into this when you sent those pictures to me. Either tell me what you want to destroy them or this conversation ends now."

"I want her, today at my place. Alone."

"Not acceptable."

"Then the pictures will be all over the internet in a matter of hours."

"You know that I will never let her come to you alone. Try again."

"I am not bargaining with you Grey. Talk to her, by 5:00 I want her on my doorstep alone."

I screamed out then looked up at Christian. "Why is he doing this?"

"I don't know baby but I won't let you go to him."

"I have to, what choice do we have?"

"Give me permission to just take care of him."

"NO! I don't want you to do that, not yet."

A door opened and Dr. Flynn peeked in at us. Christian waved him in and then as I stared off in to space I racked my brain for an answer to this. "Ana I think that is enough for the day, I will let you and Christian tell me when you want to come back and Ana I am available day or night."

"Thank you Dr. Flynn." I nodded to him as Christian whisked me back out to his car.

As he drove I just sat in stunned silence with my mind racing. Why did Jose want to see me again? Those fucking pictures, maybe I should just let him go through with posting them. The thought of being alone with him again had me scared to death.

"Ana?"

I turned from the window to gaze over at Christian, "Yes?"

"Are you alright? I feel like..." His voice stopped and I saw his jaw tighten.

"You feel like what?"

"We were so close this morning and right up till this, now I feel like I have already lost you."

His voice sounded broken and I started to cry again. "No no no! You have not lost me. I just don't want you in my mess. I should have stayed gone."

Pulling over the car Christian parked then turned to me. "You coming back to me was the best thing that could have happened. Ana you are not alone anymore. Please do not shut me out. Let me help you, the worst thing he can do is post those pictures online. Then we will get the site shut down."

"You can do that?"

"Yes, I have people watching the internet. If anything comes up with your name or mine attached it will be downed immediately."

"But maybe I should go to see him."

"No way, you trust him? I don't, not with you. He hurt you when he claimed to love you; god only knows what he would do now."

"He only hurt me in the playroom. Isn't that part of the whole thing?"

"FUCK NO!" Christian's eyes went wild, "It should never go to that. He didn't respect you, your safe word or your hard limits. NO WAY!"

"Stop, we cannot fight between us." I shake my head and sigh. "This is what he wants."

"We can argue but I will not have you upset over him anymore. Come on let's have lunch.

Lunch was a quiet time as we just sat talking about anything else. I wished with all my heart that we could just run away from it all and go somewhere no one knew us. How long would it go on? When would I finally be free?

As we walked back towards the car his cell went off and he motioned for me to be quiet. I looked around and motioned back to him that I was going to a store to give him space. Wandering aimlessly through the aisles I turned as I heard my name.

"Ana, you are alive I see?"

It was a female voice that I recognized. I turned to see Elena standing in front of me. "Fuck me." I muttered under my breath. Behind her I saw another familiar face, Jack. Fuck fuck fuck my brain started to swear loudly at me to get out of there but I could not move.

"So alone?"

"What do you want Elena? We are not friends."

Jack sauntered over and gave me a look that made my skin crawl as his eyes roamed up and down my body. I felt naked in front of him again but this time I was not tied down. I glared back at him.

"Ana, we have a special bond. We have both fucked Christian Grey. That is an exclusive club."

"Go to hell Elena and Jack fuck off."

"You going to let me this time?" Jack moved towards me as I shook my head in disgust.

"Hell no, come any closer and I will start screaming."

Elena laughed and moved to the side so Jack had a straight walk over to me. "Bitch." I spat at her and then got out my cell trying to text Christian as Jack advanced on me.

"Come quietly little one, you can save your screams for later. I like when you fight me."

"I said fuck off." I stepped back hitting send on a message to Christian as I bumped into a rack of clothes behind me.

"Fuck off is in invitation. You come here and I will gladly fuck you."

"No you won't." I shoved him back and scrambled past him running into Elena.

"Watch it bitch." I heard her hiss at me.

"Watch this." I shoved Elena as hard as I could then felt Jack grab me. I kicked him hard in the knee and ran towards the door. Elena was leaning against a rack of clothes but Jack was hot on my heels.

"Jack, go away." I screamed back at him as I ran out of the door but he was quicker than I was.

Slamming me into the wall of the store Jack grinned coldly at me. "Damn Ana, you are one feisty little bitch." Running one hand over my face he suddenly clutched my throat. "I can see why Jose wants to keep you. The fight in you is something else."

"Jack please."

"Now you want to beg, after you piss me off. Sorry that won't work now Ana."

"Then this will." I heard Christian say as he tore Jose off me.

With a single punch to Jack's jaw Christian downed him but Jack jumped right back up grabbing me. He kissed me hard while I gagged. "Ewww fuck you." I screamed at him then quickly bit his lip as hard as I could.

He slapped my face hard making me fall back against the wall hard while Christian went at him again. Like a crazed animal Christian hit Jack over and over again but Jack would not give up. The two of them went back and forth until finally Christian knocked Jack down on his knees. "Fuck you and your whore. She is not worth it." Jack hissed back at him.

"See that is where you are wrong." Christian glared down at him, "Ana is worth it all and more, that whore you were with...she is the worthless one. Tell me are you the one who knocked her up because I know it is not mine."

Jack just stared back at him without speaking. As I pulled myself back up to standing I noticed a group gathering watching them fight. I ran over to Christian trying to pull him towards the car only to see Elena standing there. With no more patience left I balled up my fist and just as my father taught me I let my fist connect with her jaw then pushed her aside climbing into the car. Christian hopped in quickly and we drove off in silence.


	15. Chapter 15

**Against All Odds- Chapter 15**

Sitting back against the seat as Christian drives I start to feel the pain. First in my cheek where Jack slapped me and then in my hand from punching Elena. I don't know why but I suddenly started to laugh. "I always wanted to punch that bitch."

"You got her good too. I would have liked a video of that." Christian grinned over at me. "Oh baby your poor face."

I leaned forward pulling down the visor to peek in the mirror, "is it that bad?" Then I see it, already my cheek is taking on a bruised look.

"Let's head back to my place so you can ice that."

He heads back to his house as I remember my cell. I see that I also received the same pictures that Christian did. I gazed at them closely looking for any details. Jose is a photographer who prides him on his work; I know this is his work. As I stared them I frowned as I recognized something, "That bastard, this is from the first night."

I point to one of the pictures and cringe. It's me, god I was so drunk that first night when Jose picked me up in that bar. I remembered all the things he whispered to me on the way back to his place then when we got there I thought for sure he was kidding until I saw the room.

That room, supposed made for pleasure looked like a torture chamber. Everywhere you looked there were shackles to tie me down and things to torment me with. As I sat back against the seat I remembered details of that night. He tied me to the bed and came at me over and over again with rounds of pleasure still I screamed then pain so intense it brought tears to my eyes. Until this moment I thought that was what being a Sub was, enduring pain but now I wondered.

Turning my head I gazed at Christian, "did you hurt your subs too?"

With a tight jaw he eyed him for a moment before looking back at the road. "Sometimes but the point was to test their limits."

"But you always stopped when they used the safe word?"

"Yes Ana always." His hands tightened on the steering wheel and he reached over to turn the radio off. "The Sub is in full control, when they say red play ends. That is the rules."

"The rules." I laughed bitterly then closed my eyes. So many nights flashed in my memory that Jose did as he wanted, I remember the first time I used my safe word on him. He was so angry with me that for the rest of the week he barely spoke to me. "Christian, have you ever dated a Sub, like the way Jose and I were?"

"No, that never works. Ana a Sub is not, oh how can I explain this? It's not a romantic thing, it's just an arrangement."

"So you felt nothing for any of them?"

"I felt sexually attracted to them but if you mean did I love any of them no, I did not."

"So I was a fool to ever think that he loved me?"

"If you want a Dom's opinion, yes you were but Ana if you want my opinion as the man who is in love with you...there is no way anyone could not love you."

"I don't know what I was thinking; look how much time I wasted."

Pulling into the driveway quickly Christian parked the car then turned to me. "Stop it Ana. I will not let you blame yourself. It is over and now you will never have to worry about it again. Come on my little slugger, let's ice that cheek."

Inside the house I sat down on the couch at his orders while he grabbed an ice pack. As I sat my mind wandered, why did I think that just because Jose wanted to fuck me that must mean he loved me? Was I just such a great piece of ass that he was willing to lie to keep me? I groaned at that thought and shook my head. Looking up at Christian I whispered, "Can't I just run away again?"

"No Ana Steele you are not running. First because I would just chase you down. You are my heart, my soul and my life; I will not be without you again. Second, you are not in the wrong here and one way or another we will figure this out...together."

With that he gently placed the ice pack on my face as I gazed at him. "Do you have a playroom too?"

"Yeah I do, for now."

"For now?"

"I don't want to ever take you in there."

"Why not?"

"Look at me Ana." His blue-grey eyes softened as he gazed into my blue ones. "The women I took in there were just ones I wanted to have sex with, there were no feelings involved. When I was with them it was about me and my pleasure but...but with you it is the complete opposite. I want to see you writhing in pleasure and when you say my name it makes me happier than I have ever been. Before you I never made love."

"Never?" I blinked at him in disbelief.

"No I Ana I didn't make love, I fucked hard. It was for me, not them."

"I see, but what if I liked some of the..." I stopped searching for the right way to explain it to him.

His eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled at me, "you liked some of the rough stuff? Is that what you are trying to say as you blush bright red?"

"Maybe."

Just maybe?"

"Yeah maybe."

"Well maybe you will never know then."

"CHRISTIAN!"

"ANA!"

"You are mean."

"Is this mean?" He leaned over lightly kissing my bruised cheek then moving to my lips.

I moaned softly in answer and kissed him back. "If I am too mean maybe I should stop?"

"No, don't stop." I moved to pull him closer but my punching hand brushed against his shoulder I cried out in pain.

"Ana?" He gently took my hand kissing it then as he looked at me his face changed, his eyes darkened and I could not look away. "Watching you fight back against Jack, you are so strong. I had no idea how strong you were." He suddenly reached down to pick me up and slowly walked down the hallway.

As he carried me he continued to speak to me, "Then when you hit Elena, I just stared. I have never seen that side of you Ana. Maybe we can do both." He hesitated in front of a door that I had not noticed before at the end of the hallway. He kicked it open and I gazed for the first time into Christian's playroom.

"Do both?" I look around, I see many of the same things that Jose had but being in here with Christian it just felt different. Instead of being afraid I could feel myself growing excited. "You mean you would want me in here?"

"I was thinking of just emptying out this room until today." He told me as he walked over to a cross against the wall. After placing me on my feet Christian started kissing me hard and fast as he pushed me gently against that cross. The cold leather against my back and his warm body pressing against me made me even more excited. "Ana do you trust me?"

Not missing a beat I kissed him back just as hard and wrapped one leg around his leg. I whispered back to him, "I trust you with my life Christian."

"Promise to use your safe word if needed?"

"Yes sir." I answered as a Sub but he stopped kissing me pulling back in horror.

"No, never sir to you Ana. We are lovers, equals even in this room. This is play nothing more, you are not my Sub."

"I understand that Christian and I want to play." I pulled him back to me kissing him hard.

"Very well my love, let's try something then." He pushed me back against the cross hard this time with a cocky grin on his face. "First I want you to strip down. I have wanted to fuck you since I watched you punch that bitch."

He moved after from me then disappearing into the hallway as I stripped down. The lights dimmed suddenly and I heard music come on. Swaying my hips I leaned back against the cross as I sang. When Christian came back into the room he just stopped in the doorway staring me.

With a playful smirk I turned to lean my breasts on the cross as I shook my ass at him but that was when he took charge. He slammed me into the cross with his body pressing against mine. I moaned as I felt his jeans brush against my bare skin while he shackled my arms up on the sides of the cross.

"Now my love, this is going to be short and sweet I fear. Seeing you shaking your ass like that has got me ready to fuck you." He ground against me, "feel that? You did that and Ana I am not fighting it. I want you now."

With that I felt his hands push my hips against the cross hard while his legs pushed mine open and with one hard thrust he buried himself deep inside me. I cried out in surprise and then moaned in sweet pleasure as he slowly rotated his hips before he started pounding into me harder and deeper than he had the night before. Each thrust hit me in places that made me wetter and louder.

His name is all I remember saying as he took him higher and higher till I exploded around him. My knees wobbled and I let the shackles hold me up as I let myself get lost in this moment. My whole body was on fire with the heat between us and then I felt him release inside me with a hard thrust that made me whimper as I shook hard.

"Ana...what you do to me." He whispered hoarsely as he leaned forward to rest his head against my shoulder.

"I think it's what you do to me."

That made him laugh, "Oh Ms. Steele, I am not done with you yet."

"Is that so?" I clenched my legs together and heard him groan in response.

"Do that again and I will be spanking you."

"Spanking?" I gazed at him and I squeezed myself tight around him again.

"Damn it Ana, you want to be spanked?"

Without a word I gave his answer by squeezing myself tighter around him and then swaying my hips side to side. I gasped as he pulled out of me then I felt a sharp tingling on one side my ass as his hand slapped it.

"Fuck..." I muttered then cried out as I felt another.

"Count." I heard the command. One I had heard many times before but this time it sounded different to my ears. Maybe it was because I was with someone like Christian and this time I was not worried about being a perfect sub. I was just lost in this moment of him and me and pleasure

"One, Two!" I cried out instantly then again as I felt another slap. "Three."

"Your ass is quite tempting but I think three is enough. Now Ms. Steele, come with me."

Falling back against him as he released me I slowly turned to face him. He pulled me with him to the bed. Lying on his bed he stared at me. "I want to watch you."

"Watch me?" I grinned at him knowing what he wanted; the sight of him was just too tempting to tease him so I climbed over him at once.

"Yes watch you over me. I want to see your face this time."

I didn't know what to say but instead I let myself go launching myself at Christian leaning down to kiss his lips as I eased him back inside my body. With a moan I start rocking my hips at once.

"Lean up let me see you."

I let him push me up to straddling him and with our fingers entwined I rode him slowly at first but then as he bucked at him harder and faster till the sight of him under me pushed me over the edge. Clenching his fingers I closed my eyes and let go calling out his name over and over. With a groan he released inside me then stilled as I collapsed forward unto his chest.

Drifting in his arms I let my mind wander till I dozed off into another nightmare but this time Christian was there with me. We were standing together but it was dark and I could not tell where we were. Hand in hand we stood waiting and waiting till there was a loud noise and a bright light flashing ahead. Christian started to walk towards it but I froze when I noticed a shadowy figure in the distance...Jose and in front of him was a bright fire.

"Ana just tell me that he is a better fuck than me and I might let you have the pictures."

"What is the fire for?" I demanded staring at him while walking closer with Christian. "And fuck you Jose! Let it go, you pushed me till I left. End of story. Let. Me. Go."

Then suddenly I was alone as Jose came between Christian and I...he was pushing the pictures in his face and commenting. "You know what Ana really likes? I can help you with that see look at this picture, this was the first night I fucked her. She was drunk and easy, was she easy for you too?"

Before Christian can say a word in my defense I lunged at Jose and grabbed the pictures. I stood before him and started ripping them in half before I tossed them into the fire. "Watch them burn because I am DONE! You hear that you fucker I AM DONE! Done with running and worrying about what others will think if they see these pictures. You cannot and will not win because you will never have me again!"

"Ana!" I heard Christian say and as I turned to look at him I was suddenly blinded and it's dark. I felt him shaking me and I slowly opened my eyes. "Ana, wake up."

I stared at him as he kissed me hard, "I want you to say those words to him, tell him once and for all that you are done. Fight back."

Kissing him back I let myself get lost in his embrace but then pushed him back as I stared to wake up, "Wait! You heard what I said?"

"You were screaming it in your sleep Ana, I am not deaf."

"Oh my god, what time is it?"

"It is almost 5."

"Should I go and confront him?"

"Ana that is up to you but if you do know that I am right behind you. I will not let you go alone."

"But that was his conditions."

"And you having me with you is my conditions."

I smiled at him and leaned over to kiss him, "Christian, I love you and I know you want to protect me from all this but I have to do this on my own. If I don't end this now, we will never be free."

"You are very strong and brave Ana but please, I want to be there for you."

"You already are, in every way you can be but this is my devil to face."

"You are right but know if you need me I will be there."

"Fair enough Mr. Grey." I reluctantly hopped out of bed and got dressed. Then before I headed out to confront Jose I turned to Christian blowing him a kiss. "

All the way over to Jose's place my mind was full of what I should say and how I should say it but then as I stopped the car I blanked. I just stared at the house. All the anger and pain he caused me started to come to the surface. This was it, my moment to finally let it all out. I opened my car door and headed to the porch.


End file.
